Posts tagged: Breast Cancer Support

Surgery scheduled

Question:

Good Luck, my good friend. (((((Mike))))) Sincerely, Bob — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Thanks, Bob… and everyone who wrote… I feel truly blessed to have this Net family to lean on. You are a great bunch of people! One more week…. and counting… and hoping for a good outcome! Take care! Mike :)

Good Luck, my good friend. (((((Mike))))) Sincerely, Bob

 . — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Hi, Mike, Sending strength and calmness your way… I can’t wit until this is over for you. smiles, Elise

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Thanks, Bob… and everyone who wrote… I feel truly blessed to have this Net family to lean on. You are a great bunch of people! One more week…. and counting… and hoping for a good outcome! Take care! Mike :) Good Luck, my good friend. (((((Mike))))) Sincerely, Bob  . — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

– The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

<Gently snipped ::Just needed to vent.  Today has been a teary one for some reason.  Tomorrow ::will be better. Dear Mike, I think it`s quite understandable you feel teary eyed today. You`ve been through a lot of emotional upheaval the last few weeks. Setting a date for surgery would be hard for anybody. We`ll get you through the next few weeks! You are going to be just fine :) (((((Mike))))) Jackie ~*~"It’s the crazy ones that have all the good pills"~*~   ~~Kim Cattrall — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Mike, I’m glad your surgery date is set, and that it’s soon. You’ll have so much peace of mind afterwards. I’ll be thinking of you and keeping you in my prayers. xxoo Anne — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

"MH"  wrote : Got back from Atlanta today.  Saw *yet another* doctor yesterday for one last opinion.  Came away more convinced that I need to stick with the doctor I saw last week.  So that’s the plan!  Surgery August 24….

        That’s a tough decision to make.  Keep us posted, Mike!  Hope all goes well. Dennis — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Got back from Atlanta today.  Saw *yet another* doctor yesterday for one last opinion.  Came away more convinced that I need to stick with the doctor I saw last week.  So that’s the plan!  Surgery August 24…. hopefully just a few days in the hospital.  Hopefully, the pathology will be clear…. but, of course, I’m thinking of all the what ifs!  :( Nothing I can do about it at this point, however.  Just have to go through it and see what awaits me when I wake up.

Now this sounds more positive! A positive attitude going into surgery will make it easier for you to deal with I think. Donated a pint of blood for myself yesterday.  The surgeon said he did not think I would need any blood, but I wanted to have a pint on hand just in case.  I had never donated blood before… and was very anxious about it. Turned out to be very easy.  When I get past the surgery, I’ll have to remember to become a donor.  I always assumed that they wouldn’t want blood from someone taking Xanax or anti-depressants.  Seems that is not the case.

Good planning. I have been a donor for quite a while giving both whole blood and platelets totalling about 90-95 donations in total. There is a pharmaceutical list that the blood services have that lists the acceptable medications. Oh, well…. two weeks from today….. and this time…. it will be over and I’ll hopefully be recovering with a wonderful morphine drip!  Three weeks from today, I’ll hopefully be on the way back home to regain my strength and get back to living! Just needed to vent.  Today has been a teary one for some reason. Tomorrow will be better.

Teary days come and go depending upon the stresses that are being faced and venting here is a very good idea. Good Luck. — Ron P Home Page:  http://fp.kwic.com/~rwebb Just remember….if the world didn’t suck, we’d all fall off. — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Hi, Mike, Sounds like a plan!  That was wise thinking to donate your blood just in case.  I am a blood donor at least once a year and my hubby usually gets there 2 or 3 times a year. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.  I can’t wait until this is over for you… ((((((Mike)))))) smiles, Elise

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Got back from Atlanta today.  Saw *yet another* doctor yesterday for one last opinion.  Came away more convinced that I need to stick with the doctor I saw last week.  So that’s the plan!  Surgery August 24…. hopefully just a few days in the hospital.  Hopefully, the pathology will be clear…. but, of course, I’m thinking of all the what ifs!  :(  Nothing I can do about it at this point, however.  Just have to go through it and see what awaits me when I wake up. Donated a pint of blood for myself yesterday.  The surgeon said he did not think I would need any blood, but I wanted to have a pint on hand just in case.  I had never donated blood before… and was very anxious about it. Turned out to be very easy.  When I get past the surgery, I’ll have to remember to become a donor.  I always assumed that they wouldn’t want blood from someone taking Xanax or anti-depressants.  Seems that is not the case. Oh, well…. two weeks from today….. and this time…. it will be over and I’ll hopefully be recovering with a wonderful morphine drip!  Three weeks from today, I’ll hopefully be on the way back home to regain my strength and get back to living! Just needed to vent.  Today has been a teary one for some reason. Tomorrow will be better. Take care, all…. MikeH  . — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

– The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Got back from Atlanta today.  Saw *yet another* doctor yesterday for one last opinion.  Came away more convinced that I need to stick with the doctor I saw last week.  So that’s the plan!  Surgery August 24…. hopefully just a few days in the hospital.  Hopefully, the pathology will be clear…. but, of course, I’m thinking of all the what ifs!  :(  Nothing I can do about it at this point, however.  Just have to go through it and see what awaits me when I wake up.

Hi Mike, Sounds like you are doing the right things and making good decisions. My thoughts and best wishes are with you. Donated a pint of blood for myself yesterday.  The surgeon said he did not think I would need any blood, but I wanted to have a pint on hand just in case.  I had never donated blood before… and was very anxious about it. Turned out to be very easy.  When I get past the surgery, I’ll have to remember to become a donor.  I always assumed that they wouldn’t want blood from someone taking Xanax or anti-depressants.  Seems that is not the case.

I’ve always been a bit confused about donating while on meds. Before panic disorder, I often donated blood, but haven’t since. Maybe I should reconsider. Oh, well…. two weeks from today….. and this time…. it will be over and I’ll hopefully be recovering with a wonderful morphine drip!  Three weeks from today, I’ll hopefully be on the way back home to regain my strength and get back to living! Just needed to vent.  Today has been a teary one for some reason.  Tomorrow will be better.

Very understandable feelings. Stay positive and know that we are all wishing you the best. Very Best Wishes, Arthur — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Got back from Atlanta today.  Saw *yet another* doctor yesterday for one last opinion.  Came away more convinced that I need to stick with the doctor I saw last week.  So that’s the plan!  Surgery August 24…. hopefully just a few days in the hospital.  Hopefully, the pathology will be clear…. but, of course, I’m thinking of all the what ifs!  :(  Nothing I can do about it at this point, however.  Just have to go through it and see what awaits me when I wake up. Donated a pint of blood for myself yesterday.  The surgeon said he did not think I would need any blood, but I wanted to have a pint on hand just in case.  I had never donated blood before… and was very anxious about it. Turned out to be very easy.  When I get past the surgery, I’ll have to remember to become a donor.  I always assumed that they wouldn’t want blood from someone taking Xanax or anti-depressants.  Seems that is not the case. Oh, well…. two weeks from today….. and this time…. it will be over and I’ll hopefully be recovering with a wonderful morphine drip!  Three weeks from today, I’ll hopefully be on the way back home to regain my strength and get back to living! Just needed to vent.  Today has been a teary one for some reason.  Tomorrow will be better. Take care, all…. MikeH

Glad to hear you got another opinion and are taking your choice of procedures/Drs. As far as the blood donation, I used to think the same when it comes to all the meds I’m on, but I did recently learn that it doesn’t matter. Good luck with everything (not that you will need it) and come back soon! Tono — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Dear Mike, I think you are facing your surgery and fears with a great deal of courage.  Of course it is a teary time…it would be for anyone facing what you are.  When my daughter first found out she had breast cancer, she too cried a ton of tears.  We all did.  But here she is, finally almost at the end of the tunnel.  And you will get there too.  I am positive about that.  And we are all here to support you. You will be in my thoughts and prayers during the coming days and until the end of it all… Blessings, Rita

Got back from Atlanta today.  Saw *yet another* doctor yesterday for one last opinion.  Came away more convinced that I need to stick with the doctor I saw last week.  So that’s the plan!  Surgery August 24…. hopefully just a few days in the hospital.  Hopefully, the pathology will be clear…. but, of course, I’m thinking of all the what ifs!  :( Nothing I can do about it at this point, however.  Just have to go through it and see what awaits me when I wake up. Donated a pint of blood for myself yesterday.  The surgeon said he did not think I would need any blood, but I wanted to have a pint on hand just in case.  I had never donated blood before… and was very anxious about it. Turned out to be very easy.  When I get past the surgery, I’ll have to remember to become a donor.  I always assumed that they wouldn’t want blood from someone taking Xanax or anti-depressants.  Seems that is not the case.

 Oh, well…. two weeks from today….. and this time…. it will be over and – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I’ll hopefully be recovering with a wonderful morphine drip!  Three weeks from today, I’ll hopefully be on the way back home to regain my strength and get back to living! Just needed to vent.  Today has been a teary one for some reason. Tomorrow will be better. Take care, all…. MikeH . — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

– The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

((((((((Mike))))))))

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Got back from Atlanta today.  Saw *yet another* doctor yesterday for one last opinion.  Came away more convinced that I need to stick with the doctor I saw last week.  So that’s the plan!  Surgery August 24…. hopefully just a few days in the hospital.  Hopefully, the pathology will be clear…. but, of course, I’m thinking of all the what ifs!  :( Nothing I can do about it at this point, however.  Just have to go through it and see what awaits me when I wake up. Donated a pint of blood for myself yesterday.  The surgeon said he did not think I would need any blood, but I wanted to have a pint on hand just in case.  I had never donated blood before… and was very anxious about it. Turned out to be very easy.  When I get past the surgery, I’ll have to remember to become a donor.  I always assumed that they wouldn’t want blood from someone taking Xanax or anti-depressants.  Seems that is not the case. Oh, well…. two weeks from today….. and this time…. it will be over and I’ll hopefully be recovering with a wonderful morphine drip!  Three weeks from today, I’ll hopefully be on the way back home to regain my strength and get back to living! Just needed to vent.  Today has been a teary one for some reason. Tomorrow will be better. Take care, all…. MikeH . — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

– The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

So sorry you have to undergo surgery, Mike.  Better to be safe, I think. You vent all you need to.  I think you’re very brave doing this. {{{{{Mike}}}}} Love, Di

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Got back from Atlanta today.  Saw *yet another* doctor yesterday for one last opinion.  Came away more convinced that I need to stick with the doctor I saw last week.  So that’s the plan!  Surgery August 24…. hopefully just a few days in the hospital.  Hopefully, the pathology will be clear…. but, of course, I’m thinking of all the what ifs!  :(  Nothing I can do about it at this point, however.  Just have to go through it and see what awaits me when I wake up. Donated a pint of blood for myself yesterday.  The surgeon said he did not think I would need any blood, but I wanted to have a pint on hand just in case.  I had never donated blood before… and was very anxious about it. Turned out to be very easy.  When I get past the surgery, I’ll have to remember to become a donor.  I always assumed that they wouldn’t want blood from someone taking Xanax or anti-depressants.  Seems that is not the case. Oh, well…. two weeks from today….. and this time…. it will be over and I’ll hopefully be recovering with a wonderful morphine drip!  Three weeks from today, I’ll hopefully be on the way back home to regain my strength and get back to living! Just needed to vent.  Today has been a teary one for some reason. Tomorrow will be better. Take care, all…. MikeH

– The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Good for you, Mike! Just look at all the courage you’ve had so far with this situation! Vent and cry and whatever you need to do — I’m proud of you. Deirdre "MH"  wrote – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Got back from Atlanta today.  Saw *yet another* doctor yesterday for one last opinion.  Came away more convinced that I need to stick with the doctor I saw last week.  So that’s the plan!  Surgery August 24…. hopefully just a few days in the hospital.  Hopefully, the pathology will be clear…. but, of course, I’m thinking of all the what ifs!  :( Nothing I can do about it at this point, however.  Just have to go through it and see what awaits me when I wake up. Donated a pint of blood for myself yesterday.  The surgeon said he did not think I would need any blood, but I wanted to have a pint on hand just in case.  I had never donated blood before… and was very anxious about it. Turned out to be very easy.  When I get past the surgery, I’ll have to remember to become a donor.  I always assumed that they wouldn’t want blood from someone taking Xanax or anti-depressants.  Seems that is not the case. Oh, well…. two weeks from today….. and this time…. it will be over and I’ll hopefully be recovering with a wonderful morphine drip!  Three weeks from today, I’ll hopefully be on the way back home to regain my strength and get back to living! Just needed to vent.  Today has been a teary one for some reason. Tomorrow will be better. Take care, all…. MikeH

– The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Got back from Atlanta today.  Saw *yet another* doctor yesterday for one last opinion.  Came away more convinced that I need to stick with the doctor I saw last week.  So that’s the plan!  Surgery August 24…. hopefully just a few days in the hospital.  Hopefully, the pathology will be clear…. but, of course, I’m thinking of all the what ifs!  :(  Nothing I can do about it at this point, however.  Just have to go through it and see what awaits me when I wake up. Donated a pint of blood for myself yesterday.  The surgeon said he did not think I would need any blood, but I wanted to have a pint on hand just in case.  I had never donated blood before… and was very anxious about it. Turned out to be very easy.  When I get past the surgery, I’ll have to remember to become a donor.  I always assumed that they wouldn’t want blood from someone taking Xanax or anti-depressants.  Seems that is not the case. Oh, well…. two weeks from today….. and this time…. it will be over and I’ll hopefully be recovering with a wonderful morphine drip!  Three weeks from today, I’ll hopefully be on the way back home to regain my strength and get back to living! Just needed to vent.  Today has been a teary one for some reason.  Tomorrow will be better. Take care, all…. MikeH  . — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Support Group and Heather

Question:

I would like to pursue this a little, though.  Have we really become uncaring?

Not really (I think). But I also think we who post and visit more often can sometimes be a tad un-attuned to how our responses may read, when read by someone who doesn’t know us yet as well as we know each other. In particular, I fear it’s easy for any/all of us, to be a little short in our replies to someone who might happen along right after one of the fractious multi-party outbursts that seemingly happens every few months around some particular post or poster. (Hormonal cycles?? lunar effect??   Dunno.)  *Especially* true when the newcomer pushes a button in the vicinity of the immediately-past conflict! It’s kind of like someone stopping in my office right after I’ve had a frustrating or angry phone call with some 3rd party.  When the innocent new arrival asks something of me, there’s a heightened chance my reply might be slightly frosty.  Not their fault, also not my obligation to be in a good mood just for their benefit, but no big surprise if they’re taken aback by my tone! This is one of many reasons that I *try* to stay out of the fray, when a dust-up starts on the group.  Dust-ups make my knees jerk. <g Ann T.

Response:

Dust-ups make my knees jerk. <g

Mine too  ;-)

Response:

I’m such an infrequent poster that I doubt if anyone remembers me, but I still like to check this group to see what’s happening. I go back to the times when Catharine was a highlight with her funny stories, even though she had bone mets in about every bone of her body. As one who is not involved it gives me somewhat of a spectator’s perspective on why there was not a lot of overt sympathy for Heather but a lot of down-to-earth responses. Firstly, most here have either dealt with cancer, it’s treatments and life thereafter, or are stage IV which means on-going treatments, tests, and eventually facing end-of-life decisions. I now have mets throughout many bones, however I was only aware of problems when my hip joint/femur began to hurt. A bone scan and follow-up xrays revealed a lot more than I suspected. However, that does not mean that I’m in constant pain and going to die in a few months. Women can live for years with bone mets. Some go right on with normal lives and continue to exercise and do sports. I’m getting along OK with OTC pain relievers, zometa and femara. (So far, that is.) There is the thought that knowing for years you have mets that are not really bothering you does nothing to improve your survival. If her mother chose to live her life without being in cancer treatment then hooray for her. It’s hard to get weepy for the daughter when we’ve all lived with the cancer and learned a lot as time went on. Perhaps she should admire her mother–she may live for many more years. I hope the mother will be relatively painfree with whatever meds/treatment she decides to take and Heather will learn to mature and be able to grow on her own and not depend on her mother to provide a life for her. Just my thoughts….I hope I haven’t offended the regulars here, but this was an interesting situation. Kathie

Response:

Heather, what right do you have to tell me about my rights?  It seems that all you want is sympathy; because of our experiences, members of this group do offer each other  sensitive insights.  Take them or leave them, but don’t get mad at the posters who are definitely in the spirit of this group. Deb

Response:

Let’s cut her a bit of slack  ;-) I think it’s worthwhile to note that every single one of us has been where Heather is now – and a lot of us have have worked through at least some of it.  I think she’s angry and scared and I can certainly remember feeling that way – sometimes I *still* feel that way.  This is all new stuff for her and she’ll either get a handle on things and grow to love us or decide we can’t offer her what she wants and move on to someone who can.  None of us got it right as soon as we showed up at the door  ;-) If she’s looking for a support group she just found the best one there is – if she’s looking for a sympathy group she’ll be sorely disappointed and will move on.  Time will tell  ;-) hugs –

Response:

Heather, what right do you have to tell me about my rights? It seems that all you want is sympathy; because of our experiences, members of this group do offer each other sensitive insights. Take them or leave them, but don’t get mad at the posters who are definitely in the spirit of this group. Deb "don’t get mad at the posters who are definitely in the spirit of this group." With few exceptions, this seems to be a group of pit vipers. I’d hope more posters came here, who were Not "in the spirit of this group." And I disagree that what you’re offering are "sensitive insights". More like stone-aged clubs, hitting folks’ heads, hearts & emotions. I also consider it rude, crude, & unacceptable, to single out new posters who come here seeking support, ….. & set them up for your gang bangs & bashings, such as by putting Heather’s name in the title of this thread. This isn’t WWF with y’all ("support group") vs Heather in the ring, duking it out at your insistence & for your amusement. Some people come to support groups seeking support, not bad games. Susan, Su_Texas  my opinions

Response:

With few exceptions, this seems to be a group of pit vipers.

"we see things not as they are, but as we are."  – Anais Nin

Response:

With few exceptions, this seems to be a group of pit vipers.

Well evidently you must enjoy the company of such people because you seem to spend a lot of time bandering back and forth with us.  I would love to know who your "excepttons" are because from your many posts, any one who disagrees with you or your opinions becomes as you put it, a "pit viper".  You do have a colorful imagination Su.  Have a nice day! Bea  

Response:

Heather, what right do you have to tell me about my rights?  It seems that all you want is sympathy;

Hmmm…well "Deb" I don’t remember having any words with you here.  I asked 2 people to stop bickering in my thread about my mother.  I didn’t know I couldn’t come to a "support group" for some kindness and yes..perhaps sympathy.  For a "support group" it’s certainly filled with people who are basically telling me I have no right to my sadness.  Whatever!   Sorry I bothered some of you.  I’ve never encountered people like some of you and I won’t be joining any more groups.  Picking on me because I perhaps wanted a shoulder to lean on or to compare my experiences with some people who have been through this nightmare is all I came here for.  You’re a mean spirited person.  I hope you have some peace before *your* time comes.  Bye Now. ~~H.

Response:

If she’s looking for a support group she just found the best one there is – if she’s looking for a sympathy group she’ll be sorely disappointed

I didn’t know there was a difference.  I offer support and sympathy to people at the same time. I don’t separate them.  Perhaps leave a sign on the door here "if you want sympathy…buzz off" or something.  .  If some people in this group are too one-dimensional to do both, then I say I am not missing much by bailing out.  My advice to you would be to try to be less of a pompous nit, and realize I am dealing with the iminent loss of my dear mother.  I presented our case in a decently written post, in an intelligent manner,  told you all the medical history, etc.  I didn’t come here saying "WAHHH my mommy has cancer feel sorry for meeee." All I wanted was to be with other nice people who need a kind word every so often.  You’re not capable of it.   So…I bid you farewell.

Response:

I would like to pursue this a little, though. Have we really become uncaring?

– allan

Come on, Allan, don’t drink from that cup!  You of all people would not be so prominent in this group with Mary, Ann, Tim and numerous others I could name if we were  just a group of  cold-hearted, insensitive, uncaring people.   What I appreciate so much about this group is that when I need an answer to a question I do not get what will make me feel better but what I "need" to know to better prepare myself for the battle with bc.  Many times what I read scares the hell out of me but I know I have to face the truth so I can prepare myself for "what can happen" and pray it doesn’t.  I am taking Arimidex today because so many of you were honest enough to tell me about the side effects but also made me aware of the hope it gave me to survive longer.   Just because one poster did not find exactly what she needed from us does not diminish the good this group does.   Sometimes "support" can mean giving someone the information they may need so that they can find the strength to face up to what is upsetting them in their lives.  This information can sometimes me hard to deal with but dealing with it can help us, in my opinion.       Bea  

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I don’t think I was clear. Everyone’s response to Heather  (IMHO) was fine, it didn’t fill Heather’s need and she became hostile. I think Heather’s expectation’s were unrealistic. Oops  ;-) Maybe we should look at how we’re treating people anyway – I’ve heard a couple people this week say things could have been better. hugs –

Think of it like meeting people in a club or a bar.  You like a lot of the people you meet, but you really don’t get on with a few. When you have a bad encounter or get criticism, that might make you back off a little, check out your own attitude and maybe retune how you approach people. But it’s more like a public park than a club, we don’t put bouncers on the door to regulate who comes in or enforce a dress (attitude) code, that would make it a very boring place, and if someone comes in, meets a couple of people they don’t like and decides not to stay, well, that’s too bad, but unavoidable.  You can’t please all the people all the time.   There is a local park my daughter won’t go to "because Laura goes there": it’s not the park’s fault, and new swings won’t help. If we think that some of the people new contributors meet initially are giving a bad impression of the group, the only answer is to be out there as much as possible meeting them first and providing a counterweight. Tim

Response:

I don’t think I was clear. Everyone’s response to Heather  (IMHO) was fine, it didn’t fill Heather’s need and she became hostile. I think Heather’s expectation’s were unrealistic.

Oops  ;-) Maybe we should look at how we’re treating people anyway – I’ve heard a couple people this week say things could have been better. hugs – — allan we don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are. — Anais Nin

Response:

I don’t think I was clear. Everyone’s response to Heather  (IMHO) was fine, it didn’t fill Heather’s need and she became hostile. I think Heather’s expectation’s were unrealistic. —

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I can understand Heather’s anger, I think we all have been there at one time or another. My impression is that this is a breast cancer support group….a place where breast cancer issues are discussed.  I thought her response that we are not supporting her. I would have to agree, that the answers were based to support her mother ( she is the one with the breast cancer after all). Unfortunately for her she did not get the answers that she was looking for, what I found upsetting is the fact her response was hostile. There are lots of places on the internet, I hope she finds one she finds that meets her needs. Maybe we should pay a little more attention, then. I’ll admit to being less than sympathetic when someone comes around demanding sympathy and they’re not even the cancer survivor.  If memory serves it was Heather’s mom who had a hole eaten through her skull and it appeared to me the "support" she wanted was for someone to validate how horribly she’d been treated by her mother.  It’s hard for me to work up any sympathy for that kind of attitude. But – we all handle stress differently, I guess  ;-) — allan we don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are. — Anais Nin

Response:

I can understand Heather’s anger, I think we all have been there at one time or another. My impression is that this is a breast cancer support group….a place where breast cancer issues are discussed.  I thought her response that we are not supporting her. I would have to agree, that the answers were based to support her mother ( she is the one with the breast cancer after all). Unfortunately for her she did not get the answers that she was looking for, what I found upsetting is the fact her response was hostile. There are lots of places on the internet, I hope she finds one she finds that meets her needs.

Maybe we should pay a little more attention, then. I’ll admit to being less than sympathetic when someone comes around demanding sympathy and they’re not even the cancer survivor.  If memory serves it was Heather’s mom who had a hole eaten through her skull and it appeared to me the "support" she wanted was for someone to validate how horribly she’d been treated by her mother.  It’s hard for me to work up any sympathy for that kind of attitude. But – we all handle stress differently, I guess  ;-) — allan we don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are. — Anais Nin

Response:

She told someone to stop bickering in "her" thread – the thread doesn’t belong to her, she just made the first post.  As far as I can tell threads here aren’t owned by anybody.

I can understand Heather’s anger, I think we all have been there at one time or another. My impression is that this is a breast cancer support group….a place where breast cancer issues are discussed.  I thought her response that we are not supporting her. I would have to agree, that the answers were based to support her mother ( she is the one with the breast cancer after all). Unfortunately for her she did not get the answers that she was looking for, what I found upsetting is the fact her response was hostile. There are lots of places on the internet, I hope she finds one she finds that meets her needs.

Response:

I thought about writing sooner than this about the change in this group. But coward that I am I knew I would then be under attack. This group is so different than last year when I came looking for answers. In other groups if someone is consider ‘out of line’ the others learn to ignore them. I apoligize to Heather for the way she has ben treated here. I cringed when I read her opening post, knowing what would happen. Folks-I’m ashamed of you.

Now this is interesting. Maybe it’s because I’ve been here for so long and change is gradual, but I haven’t noticed a real shift in the way the group treats people. I and a couple of others have finally decided not to tolerate one person who’s interest in the group appears to be completely self-serving, and after ignoring her for years I finally decided to step in when she started posting bad medical advice.  I’m gonna continue to watch her and to call her on the garbage if and when she posts it.  Maybe she’ll straighten up, maybe she’ll get disgusted and leave – but I believe both are unlikely. Apparently we couldn’t meet Heather’s needs – but when someone walks in here with a chip on their shoulder some folks aren’t likely to meet their expectations, I guess.  Apparently we didn’t provide the kind of "support" she was looking for.  Hopefully she’ll find a group that can support her. She told someone to stop bickering in "her" thread – the thread doesn’t belong to her, she just made the first post.  As far as I can tell threads here aren’t owned by anybody. A lot of the time being loving toward someone means *not* giving them what they ask for, and as much as I can understand someone being angry at being deprived of a parent, in the end it’s still Mom’s decision – and if all Heather was looking for was someone to agree how awful it was that Mom kept her disease to herself, I can understand why she’d be disappointed in this group. I’m not sure that’s all she was looking for, but what I did see was her getting angry when our "support" didn’t meet her expectations and I suspect there was a bit of backchanneling going on.  Oh, well. I would like to pursue this a little, though.  Have we really become uncaring? — allan we don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are. — Anais Nin

Response:

I thought about writing sooner than this about the change in this group. But coward that I am I knew I would then be under attack. This group is so different than last year when I came looking for answers. In other groups if someone is consider ‘out of line’ the others learn to ignore them. I apoligize to Heather for the way she has ben treated here. I cringed when I read her opening post, knowing what would happen. Folks-I’m ashamed of you. ‘

Response:

I didn’t know there was a difference.  I offer support and sympathy to people at the same time. I don’t separate them.  Perhaps leave a sign on the door here "if you want sympathy…buzz off" or something.  .  If some people in this group are too one-dimensional to do both, then I say I am not missing much by bailing out.  My advice to you would be to try to be less of a pompous nit, and realize I am dealing with the iminent loss of my dear mother.  I presented our case in a decently written post, in an intelligent manner,  told you all the medical history, etc.  I didn’t come here saying "WAHHH my mommy has cancer feel sorry for meeee." All I wanted was to be with other nice people who need a kind word every so often.  You’re not capable of it.   So…I bid you farewell.

Pompous nit?  Wow.  I stand up for her and get bashed  ;-) Farewell.  I hope you find what you’re looking for. — allan we don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are. — Anais Nin

Response:

Life is tough

Question:

Anyway, regardless  of decision, and choice, we are in the same bundle. Trying to survive.

Hi John, Speaking of which, did your sis-in-law get support emails or help to get to the breast cancer newsgroup? I was just wondering, because your post got messed up by the other "J" interfering and then my computer quit and I forgot to go back and ask. There’s instructions in their FAQ http://www.cancersupporters.com/access.html (irgnore AOL – because they dropped news servers). Maybe she’s decided not or has email support? FWIW Best wishes, J

Response:

Yes I can concur with that

Why must we be so maudlin?   Because we are survivors of cancer? Because certain things in our lives have changed?  Bull puckies! Thank God that you survived your cancer and that you are alive for your family and friends to love and enjoy.  Self pity has no room in my life and it shouldn’t in yours either.  Look to your wife/family/friends for love and I’ll bet you’ll find it.  With that love, you can do anything.  And if that is not enough, try looking to God.   Crying?  I cried the day my doc told me my Gleason was 9.  PCa has yet to bring another tear to my eyes.  Try to look at the positive things in your life and cling to them.  Cry over the loss of a loved one, or your child’s wedding, or the birth of a grandchild, or the death of a beloved pet, but never cry because you feel sorry for yourself. If I have upset you with these words, then please forgive me, but I had to say them. Dave (celebrating life)

Response:

Yes I can concur with that Reuben – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -I see many posts…..we are all crying….. I do enjoy to help those crying. We need to make sure we move ahead regardless of diagnosis, and prognosis… If we suffer, fine, we need to address the suffering. If we leak, fine, we need to know not how to leak. If we want a hardon , fine. We need to know how to do that! Anyway, regardless  of decision, and choice, we are in the same bundle. Trying to survive. My 2 penny’s It was a very nasty day at work, and wanted to find some relevalnce. John Loomis

Response:

I see many posts…..we are all crying….. I do enjoy to help those crying. We need to make sure we move ahead regardless of diagnosis, and prognosis… If we suffer, fine, we need to address the suffering. If we leak, fine, we need to know not how to leak. If we want a hardon , fine. We need to know how to do that! Anyway, regardless  of decision, and choice, we are in the same bundle. Trying to survive. My 2 penny’s It was a very nasty day at work, and wanted to find some relevalnce. John Loomis

Response:

John Your "2 penney’s" are worth thousands.  Enjoy the weekend, son.  It’s just life.  It’s a shame we still have to work, instead of lying on a beach somewhere. Hang in there, Dan

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -I see many posts…..we are all crying….. I do enjoy to help those crying. We need to make sure we move ahead regardless of diagnosis, and prognosis… If we suffer, fine, we need to address the suffering. If we leak, fine, we need to know not how to leak. If we want a hardon , fine. We need to know how to do that! Anyway, regardless  of decision, and choice, we are in the same bundle. Trying to survive. My 2 penny’s It was a very nasty day at work, and wanted to find some relevalnce. John Loomis

Response:

Hi Mary

Question:

Beverley would be great easy for me to get too. that would be great hun sheldon x

Response:

Hi Mary I would love to meet others in Yorkshire living in Hull I don’t get no support I have had to find it myself. I also run my own support group for Breast cancer on the net to get me through this journey. I have met many but not from my area and it would be great to meet others. Where abouts are you? hugs Sheldonx

Response:

Hi Mary I would love to meet others in Yorkshire living in Hull I don’t get no support I have had to find it myself. I also run my own support group for Breast cancer on the net to get me through this journey. I have met many but not from my area and it would be great to meet others. Where abouts are you?

Leeds. We could arrange something in, say, Beverley? Holderness? Selby? (some of my favourite places!) Mary – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – hugs Sheldonx

Response:

Hi im new here

Question:

Hi Pam I go to see my oncoligist at Princess Royal Hospital Hull. I would love to pop in to chat with others but It is a distance for me. I just need a kick I think I have found that due to the way people are towards me im isolting myself and I really need to do something. I would love to meet you sometime. Have you got the details of someone i can speak to there. I run my own support group for breast cancer on the net my partner set it up for mebut would be nice to chat with others face to face. Thankyou take care Sheldon x

      Hi, Sheldon                   You sound quite low… but must be positive to set up a support group….Did you get a breast care nurse?  Speak to her.  she will tell you who to contact… I’m there again on Thursday morning for my 2nd chemo session…        how are your friends treating you?   mine are just the same except for pulling my leg about hair loss and absent mindedness  which I put down to chemo-brain and they put down to being my normal self    (age)   Most are the same as usual   but get embarrassed if they happen to say something sensitive…. I just laugh…  I’ve put my foot in my mouth often enough in the past,  to feel empathy with them…..                         hope you are feeling better,                                good wishes,   Pam  xx

Response:

I second Mary’s suggestion about joining an in-person support group.

… I have to admit, I didn’t enjoy my first visit — felt uncomfortable, like I didn’t have much in common with other members —

I’ve never been a good member of them either (although I have attended quite often) – but I know that I’m in the minority (I’m an okkard bugger in case that hasn’t come across) and that most patients enjoy the social side, the rapport, the exchanging of ideas and the like. We’re all different with different needs, I didn’t feel lonely or any different from how I’d been before my diagnosis and treatment but I can thoroughly recommend support groups for those who feel that their lives have changed. And, as I’ve said probably ad nauseam, this particular group is the best thing I know! Mary Mary

Response:

Hi everyone

Hi, Sheldon, Welcome to the group.  It’s a good bunch, even though we all wish no one had need to join a BC group! I second Mary’s suggestion about joining an in-person support group. I’m in the US, but have found my support group helpful.  It’s nice to talk in person with people who understand and can talk openly and unconstrainedly about BC.  Being survivors, they just "get it". I have to admit, I didn’t enjoy my first visit — felt uncomfortable, like I didn’t have much in common with other members — but I convinced myself to give it another try, and then began to relax and feel more at home there. I’ve since made some good friends in my group, whom I see outside the group. Good luck with your efforts to find a good path through this difficult territory . . . you’re making a good start. Ann T.

Response:

Hi Pam I go to see my oncoligist at Princess Royal Hospital Hull. I would love to pop in to chat with others but It is a distance for me. I just need a kick I think I have found that due to the way people are towards me im isolting myself and I really need to do something. I would love to meet you sometime. Have you got the details of someone i can speak to there. I run my own support group for breast cancer on the net my partner set it up for mebut would be nice to chat with others face to face. Thankyou take care Sheldon x

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hi everyone I come from hull uk and I want to chat to others not far from me. I feel so alone and I have no support from family and friends at all so I want to make new friends. I find i am isolating myself due to this cause I have no one coming to see me or even phoning me. I want to get out the house but have no where to go I don’t even have one friend I can call round to see when im low and have a coffee and a chat. I have also recently lost my job due to breast cancer and now I have to find another job too. My life seems to have changed so much and im desperate to change it but I find it hard to make new friends because they don’t understand me and what im going through. I just don’t know what to do to change it when you try to say how you feel but get ignored. Sorry For rambling on but I needed to tell you all how this is making me feel im just grateful i have an supportive partner and a little girl to get me through each day but it would be great to have friends too, someone you can have a laugh with and also I would love a social life again. My life has been turned upside down with this and my emotions are all over the place. hugs to all here Sheldon x

Sorry to hear about your troubles.  Welcome to the group. It is a common problem that cancer isolates you, people who haven’t been there are embarrassed to talk about it, and don’t know what to say to someone that has it. How old is your little girl?  My own daughter was six when my wife had breast cancer, now she is 11 and doing great, (and I hope she is getting ready for school right now, we should be going in five minutes) You will find that the writers on this group are pretty well spaced out physically, most are of course American, but we have a vociferous British contingent and representation from several other countries too, and somebody did mention being treated in Hull recently. — Tim Jackson -Who needs to pay Microsoft?  Free Open Source Software- www.mozilla.org       FIREFOX Web Browser,  THUNDERBIRD Email/News www.openoffice.org      Office Suite

Response:

Hi,

    I attend Hull clinic, and they’re brill… you will have been allocated a breast care nurse, all the ones I’ve met are really friendly and they have a room off the waiting room where you can pop in for a cuppa and a biscuit usually people in there ready and keen to chat, Only shown it the other day (My chemo awareness day) the chemo nurse said we can pop in any time, not just when we attend…  too far for me, I’m on the South bank… but you may be able to get easily?   It’s at the Princess Royal Hospital on Saltshouse road…   Hope this helps…..  Good luck    xx

Response:

I second Tim’s welcome. Most of the posters here have gone through their own battles with this disease.  We’re a pretty open bunch, so feel free to ask anything that’s on your mind. True, for most of us this is a pretty emotional thing.  I actually went numb for about a whole year – from the time I heard the diagnosis until most of my surgeries were done.  Guess that was my lame way of coping. Looking forward to gettting to know you. Take care. …lisa (in Massachusetts)

Response:

If you have a Breast Care Nurse she’ll probably be able to tell you about local support groups, there usually are some. If you ever come to Leeds I’d be very happy to see you. I’m one of the ‘vociferous British contingent’ mentioned by Tim. He knows, he’s met me:-) Mail me. Mary

Response:

Hi everyone I come from hull uk and I want to chat to others not far from me. I feel so alone and I have no support from family and friends at all so I want to make new friends. I find i am isolating myself due to this cause I have no one coming to see me or even phoning me. I want to get out the house but have no where to go I don’t even have one friend I can call round to see when im low and have a coffee and a chat. I have also recently lost my job due to breast cancer and now I have to find another job too. My life seems to have changed so much and im desperate to change it but I find it hard to make new friends because they don’t understand me and what im going through. I just don’t know what to do to change it when you try to say how you feel but get ignored. Sorry For rambling on but I needed to tell you all how this is making me feel im just grateful i have an supportive partner and a little girl to get me through each day but it would be great to have friends too, someone you can have a laugh with and also I would love a social life again. My life has been turned upside down with this and my emotions are all over the place. hugs to all here Sheldon x

Response:

OT: Mr. Don't-Fix-It (re breast cancer)

Question:

FurPaw <furpawnews…@comcast.net> wrote: > This article in the NY Times …

a.k.a. The Washington Post? > (free registration req’d)

Hehehehehe…. The registration ‘bot didn’t like my choices for the compulsory fields…. ________________________________________________________________________                    Louise Bremner (log at gol dot com)    If you want a reply by e-mail, don’t write to my Yahoo address!

Response:

"FurPaw" <furpawnews…@comcast.net> wrote in message

news:hsOdna_m9KS4LM3cRVn-jA@comcast.com… > Mr. Don’t-Fix-It > Nine Really Dumb (If Well-Intentioned) Things a Guy Tends to Do When the > Woman in His Life Has Breast Cancer > http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/articles/A36959-2004Sep20.html > or > http://tinyurl.com/4wtfs

———– Wow….JB is damn near perfect!  Even though he’s a professional umpire, he doesn’t use sports metaphors when talking about my illness.  Thanks for posting this. Eva

Response:

Louise Bremner wrote: > FurPaw <furpawnews…@comcast.net> wrote: >>This article in the NY Times … > a.k.a. The Washington Post?

Oh, yeah.  Duh.  I’d been reading the NYT earlier. >>(free registration req’d) > Hehehehehe…. The registration ‘bot didn’t like my choices for the > compulsory fields….

Which were…??? FurPaw — "In a sense, we are hallucinating all the time. What we call normal vision is our selecting the hallucination that best fits reality." – V. S. Ramachandran To reply, unleash the dog

Response:

FurPaw <furpawnews…@comcast.net> wrote: > >>(free registration req’d) > > Hehehehehe…. The registration ‘bot didn’t like my choices for the > > compulsory fields…. > Which were…???

Date of birth, location, and non-selection of gender, I think. ________________________________________________________________________                    Louise Bremner (log at gol dot com)    If you want a reply by e-mail, don’t write to my Yahoo address!

Response:

Eva <EvaDStructio…@NOverizon.net> wrote: > "FurPaw" <furpawnews…@comcast.net> wrote in message > news:hsOdna_m9KS4LM3cRVn-jA@comcast.com… > > http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/articles/A36959-2004Sep20.html > > or > > http://tinyurl.com/4wtfs > ———– > Wow….JB is damn near perfect!  Even though he’s a professional umpire, he > doesn’t use sports metaphors when talking about my illness.  Thanks for > posting this.

He’s a keeper! That’s probably the 11th thing not to do: "Don’t use sports metaphors." — ****** Keera in Norway ****** * Think big. Shrink to fit. * http://home.online.no/~kafox/

Response:

This article in the NY Times (free registration req’d) is about what men should (and should not) do to support their wives/girlfriends through breast cancer. If you read it more broadly, it gives useful information to SOs about what to do – and not do – when a woman has a serious medical problem. I don’t know if men will read the article more broadly – but I figured that it might help us understand the mistakes many of them are likely to make (or even we are likely to make ourselves concerning someone with a serious illness).  And if nothing else, it might help us frame requests for how we would like to be treated, should the occasion arise. Anyhow, worth a read. Mr. Don’t-Fix-It Nine Really Dumb (If Well-Intentioned) Things a Guy Tends to Do When the Woman in His Life Has Breast Cancer http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/articles/A36959-2004Sep20.html or http://tinyurl.com/4wtfs FurPaw — "In a sense, we are hallucinating all the time. What we call normal vision is our selecting the hallucination that best fits reality." – V. S. Ramachandran To reply, unleash the dog

Response:

Diet!

Question:

Last Friday, I had news that stopped my cravings for sweet , my OBGYN called and told me that I had a lump on my breast, biopsy on the 16 august at the cancer clinic, why do they call me on a Friday late afternoon for an appointment 10 days later, I don’t know, all I know is that I am scare to death.

Oh, I’m so sorry to hear it.  And I know it will be of no consolation to you to know that 90% of these lumps are perfectly harmless, as you will be quite convinced that yours won’t be!  I hope and pray it *will* be, and that this is a false alarm for you. —                                 http://www.amsmyth.demon.co.uk/index.html Website updated 7 August 2004 – for a limited time, be bored by my holiday snaps!

Response:

Last Friday, I had news that stopped my cravings for sweet , my OBGYN called and told me that I had a lump on my breast, biopsy on the 16 august at the cancer clinic, why do they call me on a Friday late afternoon for an appointment 10 days later, I don’t know, all I know is that I am scare to death.

Kiki, I’ve been lurking in this group recently, trying to get ideas for losing the weight I put on while I was inactive and self-indulgent following cancer surgery. The web site www.acor.org is home base for a large number of large and very specific mailing lists for people with cancer. I think there are actually seven breast cancer groups: a general support group, one that is devoted to the latest medical news, etc. I got great answers in the colon group from people who had been throught it all ahead of me, so I urge you to give it a try. It will reduce your anxiety while you’re waiting. Good luck! — Paul (who’s down 25 lbs. since mid-May)

Response:

First thing you need to do is go here and study up. http://www.cancer.org/docroot/home/index.asp I’m a 15 year cancer survivor and there’s nothing like knowledge to help you. Second whatever you’re doing for exercise, don’t stop.  If you’re too tired, slow down but don’t stop and particularly don’t stop aerobic exercise.  It helps with stress management and boy are you under stress, plus it generates endorphins which are a natural high.

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text –     Hello again, Last Friday, I had news that stopped my cravings for sweet , my OBGYN called and told me that I had a lump on my breast, biopsy on the 16 august at the cancer clinic, why do they call me on a Friday late afternoon for an appointment 10 days later, I don’t know, all I know is that I am scare to death. Kiki.

Response:

    Hello again, Last Friday, I had news that stopped my cravings for sweet , my OBGYN called and told me that I had a lump on my breast, biopsy on the 16 august at the cancer clinic, why do they call me on a Friday late afternoon for an appointment 10 days later, I don’t know, all I know is that I am scare to death. Kiki.

Response:

herapie….

Michelle : Ozzie in Switzerland 69.8/61.4/61kg

Response:

Michelle, I know that the waiting is the worst part. I hope that you won’t need more radiotherapie…. You are such a bunch of wonderful people… May I give all of you a huge hug… kiki Do you speak French, you are spellling radiotherapie the French way….

Response:

Thank you Mary, I will let you all know. Merci pour bonne chance, j’en ai besoin… Kiki

Response:

Thank you Annabel, what a pretty name, thank you for the prayer. Take care. Kiki

Response:

Kiki my thoughts are with you. I have been through / Still going through a thyroid cancer, 2 surguries and radiotherapie so know the stress you are going through. From my initial tests to diagnosis took about 3 months in total. I have to go back for testing in September 3 months after the radiotherapie to find out if I need another dose or if the one off was enough. Waiting is very stressful, there is a tendency to say, poor me I the best preparation you can do before facing any possible medical treatment. I had spent about 1.5 years getting to my fittest and healthiest I have been in a long time. I think I have done my best to help my body deal with what it had to go through (or maybe to still go through) by eating healthily and exercising regularly (what is realistically possible). Keeping my fingers crossed for you on the 16th and for a good result to the biopsy. Take Care Michelle : Ozzie in Switzerland 69.8/61.4/61kg – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text –    Hello again, Last Friday, I had news that stopped my cravings for sweet , my OBGYN called and told me that I had a lump on my breast, biopsy on the 16 august at the cancer clinic, why do they call me on a Friday late afternoon for an appointment 10 days later, I don’t know, all I know is that I am scare to death. Kiki.

Response:

Good luck (bonne chance) to you, Kiki — I hope that you get good news on your biopsy — please keep us informed and know that we are here for you. Mary

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text –     Hello again, Last Friday, I had news that stopped my cravings for sweet , my OBGYN called and told me that I had a lump on my breast, biopsy on the 16 august at the cancer clinic, why do they call me on a Friday late afternoon for an appointment 10 days later, I don’t know, all I know is that I am scare to death. Kiki.

Response:

    Hello again, Last Friday, I had news that stopped my cravings for sweet , my OBGYN called and told me that I had a lump on my breast, biopsy on the 16 august at the cancer clinic, why do they call me on a Friday late afternoon for an appointment 10 days later, I don’t know, all I know is that I am scare to death. Kiki.

I had one of those last year, it was just a cyst, don’t worry.  All the best for ya, I’ll be thinkin’ of ya.

Response:

No it comes from speaking German pretty much the whole day or correctly said swiss German. I get my spelling all mixed up. Michelle : Ozzie in Switzerland 69.8/61.4/61kg – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Michelle, I know that the waiting is the worst part. I hope that you won’t need more radiotherapie…. You are such a bunch of wonderful people… May I give all of you a huge hug… kiki Do you speak French, you are spellling radiotherapie the French way….

Response:

some good news

Question:

were positive, so she removed level 1 and 2 lymph nodes, 24 in all.  All 24 were negative…So I guess I am doing OK; just wish they had not removed all those lymph nodes! I am glad that all went so well.  I know how you must be feeling knowing that two of the sentinel nodes were positive, but the fact that all the others were negative is a very good sign.  As far as removing more lymph nodes, I am not sure that is done any more.  I think only the first two levels are removed.   Your dr. may still recommend a more aggressive treatment protocol based on the positive sentinel nodes, but that is very doable as many of us here can attest.  Radiation was more of a hassle only because it was daily and  I had to go 45 miles way each way to get there.  Chemo was also quite doable, and not at all as bad as anticipated.  I had 3 relatively easy pregnancies and found that the effects of chemo were less than those of the pregnancies.  They have some very good anti-nausea drugs available today.  Pregnant mothers are even given some types of aggressive chemotherapy. I hope that you are more comfortable now and heal quickly.  Take care and wishing you, belatedly, all the best!

Response:

I know, I should take it to email if I’m gonna get silly like this. Nah.

Profound and succinct. Why can’t I be like that? Mary – adding it to my commonplace book … – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Tim

Response:

Wonderful!  I have the champagne on ice, and I’ll drink to that.

Good. I’ll let you know on the date, until then practise.   Sure glad to hear you have had no problems with lymphedema.  I was kind of worried having so many nodes removed.

‘No’ problems is a matter of attitude. I’m not *without* some lymphoedema, it’s not bad and I don’t allow it to impinge on my life. My pc has been playing up and I haven’t got round to answering all my mail. I shall. Mary – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Joan Mary

Response:

and will have the drain out tomorrow.  Still a lot of soreness under the arm and other places, but I just take Aleve for it.  Trouble sleeping at times. Have you tried an ice pack for the soreness.  I found that worked wonders.   If I had any discomfort re. sleeping I was prescribed Ativan.  It worked very well for those times I needed it. It is important to start exercises and do them regularly as soon as they permit it to insure good range of motion and reduce interference of possible scar tissue formation. It’s good  to hear that you have alot of support.   Enjoy it but don’t let it interfere with your sense of comfort re your own independence.  Sometimes it helps others more than you–i.e. doing what they can in a situation which is also frightening to them.  Often times I think that the effects of a b.c. diagnosis may be worse on everyone else close to the patient than on the patient herself.  Chemo wasn’t the worst of the experiences with all this nor for others with the new anti-nausea meds which are quite effective for most. It wasn’t overly fun but much easier than a bad case of the flu and as I said before I felt worse during pregnancy for the most part. If you do have chemo there are many here who can assist you and there several other on-line support group areas as well.  You can find others with info for just about everything related to breast cancer on-line. Again, take care and wishing you all the best {{{Hugs}}}

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – were positive, so she removed level 1 and 2 lymph nodes, 24 in all.  All 24 were negative…So I guess I am doing OK; just wish they had not removed all those lymph nodes! I am glad that all went so well.  I know how you must be feeling knowing that two of the sentinel nodes were positive, but the fact that all the others were negative is a very good sign.  As far as removing more lymph nodes, I am not sure that is done any more.  I think only the first two levels are removed. Your dr. may still recommend a more aggressive treatment protocol based on the positive sentinel nodes, but that is very doable as many of us here can attest.  Radiation was more of a hassle only because it was daily and  I had to go 45 miles way each way to get there.  Chemo was also quite doable, and not at all as bad as anticipated.  I had 3 relatively easy pregnancies and found that the effects of chemo were less than those of the pregnancies.  They have some very good anti-nausea drugs available today.  Pregnant mothers are even given some types of aggressive chemotherapy. I hope that you are more comfortable now and heal quickly.  Take care and wishing you, belatedly, all the best!

Thanks for your good wishes, and all the information, Kaye.  I am healing and will have the drain out tomorrow.  Still a lot of soreness under the arm and other places, but I just take Aleve for it.  Trouble sleeping at times. I will be seeing an oncologist about any treatment I will need after radiation; he will study the lab reports and decide, I believe.  I will have radiation as soon as I have healed enough.  It isn’t too far to go, so can probably drive myself, although my sister usually insists on driving me everywhere.  I also have a son who lives with me, so I won’t need to drive, but I could if necessary.   I hope I won’t need chemo, but it looks like I will. {{{Hugs}}}  Joan

Response:

lymphoedema, it’s not bad and I don’t allow it to impinge on my life. Lymphedema happens in varying degrees.  I had it within days  after surgery. It remained quite mild for the first year or  so and then worsened.  And, although it has worsened, it is just more a ‘pain’ or bother than anything else.    It does require treatment of some kind–to keep it stabilized–and that treatment varies.  I haven’t let it stop me from doing the things I want to do–even if I shouldn’t ;-)  I decided to tackle the cleaning of our outdoor patio last night and used both arms to their full extent.  I will probably pay for it, with increased swelling for awhile.  But, I bandage it almost daily anyway–although leave my hands uncovered–except for sleeping. Life is to be lived, and I can’t bother with too many inconvenient restrictions.  I don’t allow blood tests though but I do lift and carry things.  I have to do that for work.  I suppose I could get disability but that would result in less income with no further contribution to my retirement fund (which I do realize may not be something I will enjoy but will go to my family) and then after 18 mos. my insurance would end and, besides, I like working… Anyway, lymphedema happens.  It happens to those who don’t follow the restrictions, and it still happens to those that do.  It also doesn’t happen to some who don’t follow the restrictions.  Medical understanding about it is still in the dark ages.  It is one area that you may want to consult with others about but get more than one opinion.  Hopefully, though, it will not be any problem.  

Response:

 Sure glad to hear you have had no problems with lymphedema.  I was kind of worried having so many nodes removed. I think the fact that they were negative reduces the risk of lymphedema from happening.  Hopefully, this will be something that you will never have a problem with and/or if you do, it will be very mild. Hope you are healing without much discomfort!

Response:

Before surgery, I was using one of those stretch bands for upper body strength, and the doctor said she thought that would be a good thing to do, later on.

That sounds like an excellent thing to begin getting your strength back, when ready.  Good idea! Ann T. (who is now wondering where she put her exercise bands . . . .)

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I am anxious to get rid of the drain, and on with radiation.  I want to start exercising as soon as the doctor says it is OK.  I am wondering if swimming would be good.  I think there are some public pools in my area, such as YMCA, I might look into joining.  I don’t know about risk of infection, though. I understand about the drains & getting on with it!  While very manageable, the drains *are* rather annoying. You have a good idea to get your doc’s approval before you start a new exercise program (I’m almost certain your incision will need to be fully healed), and you might want to check with the radiation onc before you join the Y, to see if you can swim during radiation.  You wouldn’t want to be laying out the membership $$ and not be able to swim!  I’m thinking the chlorine may be too drying/harsh to the skin to be managed during radiation, but I don’t know.  Anyone know? Beyond that, and making sure you have sufficient strength and range of motion when you start, swimming should be good.

I will wait for the OK from my doctors.  I used to love to swim so hope I can do so again. (However, it makes me ill at ease to force my fingers to type that . . . I *hate* the water, and in January began swimming lessons — I tell my friends this is because I looked up "idiocy" in the dictionary and saw a picture of a rower that couldn’t swim <g.  So, I’m now swimming 2-3 times a week, and still think it *quite* icky.  Making good skills progress, though, which is the point.  But I digress.). Good luck on finding an exercise program that works for you!

Before surgery, I was using one of those stretch bands for upper body strength, and the doctor said she thought that would be a good thing to do, later on. Joan – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Ann T.

Response:

Warning:  Nothing of any redeeming or useful value follows, nor anything relevant to Joan’s post that began this thread, other than quotes from what you’ve already read in Mary’s previous posting.  It’s just pure nonsense.  I’m in a mood.

I love you when you’re in a mood. But i would, wouldn’t I? <BG All mine were removed, too, and only one negative.  I only had nine, which as Tim pointed out is more of a physiological coincidence than anything else. Yes, and they’re not in nice little rows or lines either, despite what the diagrams seem to describe. Oh, mine were in little rows.  Very neat rows. On a hard bench. Hands folded, knees together, wearing tiny white gloves and successfully supressing giggles because of the gravity of the situation. <G  The surgeon was Quite Shocked.

The exception proves the Rule … – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Still no lymphedema for me, despite fairly extensive radiation on that side, and a variety of bumps, bruises, scratches, scrapes, insect bites, and a heckuva lot of repetitive resistance upper body exercise. You’re describing me! A couple of weeks after surgery I fell on animal (goat and poultry) deposited-on gravel and scraped all the soft, tender skin on my affected forearm. I couldn’t be bothered finding the nearest A&E for antibiotics because I ws so thrilled to be back to Real Life (at a mediaeval village) and so I just plastered it with Savlon (First Aiders can now faint!). Nothing happened. Since then I’ve been bruised, scratched, bitten, stung, carried heavy weights dependently (horrors!) and lifted and carried lots of other heavy things and sawn branches and put up canvas tents (and taken them down wet through). Shhh!  Quiet!  Someone will figure out that — despite the fact that I’m in the US, you’re in the UK, listmembers have met both of us and have photos to prove it, you’re married & I’m not, we have different birthdays — we’re actually the same person!  After all, we’ve never been seen in the same room . . . .

Oh blast! Our/my secret’s out … well it was nice while it lasted. You forgot the swimming bit, I love the water but couldn’t do all that rowing or whatever it is … I’m not suggesting that this is The Thing To Do but it’s my life and I’m not going to lie on a chaise in a darkened room. Would there be bonbons?  Copious bonbons?  I’d consider the chaise if there were copious bonbons.

I’m make exactly the sort you love. I wouldn’t eat anything I don’t love. I keep a sort of Commonplace book with wise words I collect from several sources – many from here. One is: "Life is not a journey to the grve with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming …. WOW … WHAT A RIDE!!!" Don’t know where that came from but above it is a very wise set of words from one Ann Thorsen. Huh?  I didn’t say that.  I don’t think.  Or is that not what you meant?

No, you said: "I *think* I’ve learned something from this:  I have some control over the worry part, so why do it?  The unanticipated things will always be unanticipated, so why worry about them, either?  One day at a time; approach things with curiousity and an open mind!" It’s worth repeating. I might’ve said "mumble" and scratched myself somewhere indelicate: I’m normally quite careful to avoid being profound, inspirational, . . . or even fundamentally coherent, for that matter.  This post a case in point!

Well yes, but in a moment of forgetfulness, perhaps when the itch had temporarily gone away, you let something drop which others found inspiring … <more snips, this set leading to quite an abrupt transition But I’m here! And in a few weeks I’ll want you all to toast my six years :-) )))) Get the champagne in NOW- everyone! YayYayYay!  I’ll drink to that!

And I expect bon bons. (I know, I should take it to email if I’m gonna get silly like this. I’ll try to Do Better Next Time.)

Ann, you couldn’t do better! Your doppelganger, Mary – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Ann T.

Response:

I’m confused…you were told: Two of 3 sentinal nodes were positive, so 24 level one AND 2 were removed, but all 24 were negative. —   There appears to have been some kind of (communication?)– error ’cause something sure doesn’t add up here, or were there a total of 27 removed with 24 negative? It’s a shame so many had to be taken — I’m sorry.

Yes, a total of 27 were removed. Two sentinel nodes were positive; one was negative.  So she proceeded to remove 24 nodes, and these 24 were all negative.  I have the report, and that is what it says.  ….24 out of 24 axillary nodes all negative for metastatic disease…It also says the tumor type is infiltrating ductal cell carcinoma.  Histologic grade:  Grade III, poorly differentiated.  Tumor size:  Maximum diameter of invasive carcinoma is 0.8 cm.  All surgical margins are free of tumor.  In-situ carcinoma is present and makes approx. 5% of the tumor.  In-situ type:  solid pattern.  I don’t know what all this means, but I think it is favorable, as she said it was good news. She says the size of the tumor is much smaller than it first appeared. Don’t blame you for wishing they weren’t, though. SEEMS a bit excessive, although I’m sure your surgeon thought it was best. — Know that things WILL improve –and heal more quickly –once the drain is out, so hang in there.

I know you are right, so am trying to deal with it as best I can.  Sometimes have trouble sleeping when the prescription for Lortab just doesn’t work. It is better being home than the hospital, though. Joan – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Namaste, Lady8

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– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I saw my surgeon today, and she told me that two of the three sentinel nodes were positive, so she removed level 1 and 2 lymph nodes, 24 in all.  All 24 were negative. I still have the drain until Monday, when she will take it out.  It is really sore and uncomfortable, but I am taking Lortab at night to sleep. A nurse comes by twice a week to help.  I will see an oncologist on the 24th to discuss treatment after radiation. So I guess I am doing OK; just wish they had not removed all those lymph nodes! Better out than in sometimes, Joan. All mine were removed and all were negative. I don’t care :-)

I guess that is why they were all removed.  My surgeon is very conservative; she did say people vary in the number of nodes they have, so could not tell in advance how many I had.  It just seems a lot to me, but she has a good reputation and is very thorough.  She told me if any of the sentinel nodes were positive, she would go ahead with the axillary node removal, so the 24 additional nodes were removed.  That is 27 total. It was so nice to hear from you again, Mary. Joan – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Good of you to keep us up to date, thanks. And gentle hugs … Mary {{{Hugs}}}  Joan

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I saw my surgeon today, and she told me that two of the three sentinel nodes were positive, so she removed level 1 and 2 lymph nodes, 24 in all. Better out than in sometimes, Joan. All mine were removed and all were negative. I don’t care :-) All mine were removed, too, and only one negative.  I only had nine, which as Tim pointed out is more of a physiological coincidence than anything else. Yes, and they’re not in nice little rows or lines either, despite what the diagrams seem to describe. As I understand it – and I’m very happy to be enlightened – the nodes are numerous and packed in – surrounded by – protected by – fat. Some, probably the ones very high up, are very small, pin head size. In my case, again as I understand it, the whole lot, fat and all, were scooped out very high up. I believe – because I can still feel the sensation – that the scoop went as far as under my collar bone. I could be wrong – it has been known (G) – but when I suggested this to my surgeon he said that was the case and was surprised that I understood that. When I asked WHY the lot was removed, what made him take everything out, he couldn’t give a scientific reason, he just said, "experience". That was good enough for me although I did resent it at the time. But what might have been the case if he’d left some in? I don’t know. I don’t suppose anyone KNOWS. I trust him. I have no option – but I’m still here :-) Still no lymphedema for me, despite fairly extensive radiation on that side, and a variety of bumps, bruises, scratches, scrapes, insect bites, and a heckuva lot of repetitive resistance upper body exercise. You’re describing me! A couple of weeks after surgery I fell on animal (goat and poultry) deposited-on gravel and scraped all the soft, tender skin on my affected forearm. I couldn’t be bothered finding the nearest A&E for antibiotics because I ws so thrilled to be back to Real Life (at a mediaeval village) and so I just plastered it with Savlon (First Aiders can now faint!). Nothing happened. Since then I’ve been bruised, scratched, bitten, stung, carried heavy weights dependently (horrors!) and lifted and carried lots of other heavy things and sawn branches and put up canvas tents (and taken them down wet through). I’m not suggesting that this is The Thing To Do but it’s my life and I’m not going to lie on a chaise in a darkened room. I keep a sort of Commonplace book with wise words I collect from several sources – many from here. One is: "Life is not a journey to the grve with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming …. WOW … WHAT A RIDE!!!" Don’t know where that came from but above it is a very wise set of words from one Ann Thorsen. And the used-up-worn-out bit is coming on fast. (Yet one of the women in my support group believes she triggered lymphedema by squeezing too hard when opening a difficult jar lid, so who knows.  But still another had many more nodes removed than I, does everything — e.g., climbing trees! — and has had no problem.) Oh – I forgot about climbing trees. I don’t do that much but I do climb ladders to gutter height to cut down ivy from the side of our house! I’ve done it since my surgery and every year I wish the surgeon could see me – he’d be proud of me! Despite some of the lymphedema cautions one reads, I definitely lift more than 10-15 pounds with the affected side. . . I lift about as much as I physically can, short of injury risk.  I know for sure that I’ve lifted at least 40 pounds with the affected side, with reasonable frequency — no problems. Me too. Don’t go pushing yourself hard until you’re fully healed from surgery and radiation, though! No – but the prescribed exercises are very important. If I hadn’t done them I wouldn’t be able to do what I do now. And it’s not a one-off, I have to stretch every day. Also, I STILL can feel some – er – not exactly pain but sensations in my back and side and occasionally my arm aches. But I’m here! And in a few weeks I’ll want you all to toast my six years :-) )))) Get the champagne in NOW- everyone!

Wonderful!  I have the champagne on ice, and I’ll drink to that.  Sure glad to hear you have had no problems with lymphedema.  I was kind of worried having so many nodes removed. Joan – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Mary

Response:

I know, I should take it to email if I’m gonna get silly like this.

Nah. Tim

Response:

I am anxious to get rid of the drain, and on with radiation.  I want to start exercising as soon as the doctor says it is OK.  I am wondering if swimming would be good.  I think there are some public pools in my area, such as YMCA, I might look into joining.  I don’t know about risk of infection, though.

I understand about the drains & getting on with it!  While very manageable, the drains *are* rather annoying. You have a good idea to get your doc’s approval before you start a new exercise program (I’m almost certain your incision will need to be fully healed), and you might want to check with the radiation onc before you join the Y, to see if you can swim during radiation.  You wouldn’t want to be laying out the membership $$ and not be able to swim!  I’m thinking the chlorine may be too drying/harsh to the skin to be managed during radiation, but I don’t know.  Anyone know? Beyond that, and making sure you have sufficient strength and range of motion when you start, swimming should be good. (However, it makes me ill at ease to force my fingers to type that . . . I *hate* the water, and in January began swimming lessons — I tell my friends this is because I looked up "idiocy" in the dictionary and saw a picture of a rower that couldn’t swim <g.  So, I’m now swimming 2-3 times a week, and still think it *quite* icky.  Making good skills progress, though, which is the point.  But I digress.). Good luck on finding an exercise program that works for you! Ann T.

Response:

Warning:  Nothing of any redeeming or useful value follows, nor anything relevant to Joan’s post that began this thread, other than quotes from what you’ve already read in Mary’s previous posting.  It’s just pure nonsense.  I’m in a mood. All mine were removed, too, and only one negative.  I only had nine, which as Tim pointed out is more of a physiological coincidence than anything else. Yes, and they’re not in nice little rows or lines either, despite what the diagrams seem to describe.

Oh, mine were in little rows.  Very neat rows. On a hard bench. Hands folded, knees together, wearing tiny white gloves and successfully supressing giggles because of the gravity of the situation. <G  The surgeon was Quite Shocked. Still no lymphedema for me, despite fairly extensive radiation on that side, and a variety of bumps, bruises, scratches, scrapes, insect bites, and a heckuva lot of repetitive resistance upper body exercise. You’re describing me! A couple of weeks after surgery I fell on animal (goat and poultry) deposited-on gravel and scraped all the soft, tender skin on my affected forearm. I couldn’t be bothered finding the nearest A&E for antibiotics because I ws so thrilled to be back to Real Life (at a mediaeval village) and so I just plastered it with Savlon (First Aiders can now faint!). Nothing happened. Since then I’ve been bruised, scratched, bitten, stung, carried heavy weights dependently (horrors!) and lifted and carried lots of other heavy things and sawn branches and put up canvas tents (and taken them down wet through).

Shhh!  Quiet!  Someone will figure out that — despite the fact that I’m in the US, you’re in the UK, listmembers have met both of us and have photos to prove it, you’re married & I’m not, we have different birthdays — we’re actually the same person!  After all, we’ve never been seen in the same room . . . . I’m not suggesting that this is The Thing To Do but it’s my life and I’m not going to lie on a chaise in a darkened room.

Would there be bonbons?  Copious bonbons?  I’d consider the chaise if there were copious bonbons. I keep a sort of Commonplace book with wise words I collect from several sources – many from here. One is: "Life is not a journey to the grve with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming …. WOW … WHAT A RIDE!!!" Don’t know where that came from but above it is a very wise set of words from one Ann Thorsen.

Huh?  I didn’t say that.  I don’t think.  Or is that not what you meant? I might’ve said "mumble" and scratched myself somewhere indelicate: I’m normally quite careful to avoid being profound, inspirational, . . . or even fundamentally coherent, for that matter.  This post a case in point! <more snips, this set leading to quite an abrupt transition But I’m here! And in a few weeks I’ll want you all to toast my six years :-) )))) Get the champagne in NOW- everyone!

YayYayYay!  I’ll drink to that! (I know, I should take it to email if I’m gonna get silly like this. I’ll try to Do Better Next Time.) Ann T.

Response:

Yes, a total of 27 were removed. Two sentinel nodes were positive; one was negative.  So she proceeded to remove 24 nodes, and these 24 were all negative.  I have the report, and that is what it says.  ….24 out of 24 axillary nodes all negative for metastatic disease…It also says the tumor type is infiltrating ductal cell carcinoma.  Histologic grade:  Grade III, poorly differentiated.  Tumor size:  Maximum diameter of invasive carcinoma is 0.8 cm.  All surgical margins are free of tumor.  In-situ carcinoma is present and makes approx. 5% of the tumor.  In-situ type:  solid pattern.  I don’t know what all this means, but I think it is favorable, as she said it was good news.

If I’m interpreting the above correctly, your tumor was fairly small, had "clear borders" and has a small percentage of active cancerous cells. All of that is about the best news you could get (short of the whole thing being benign). If I’m wrong about anything, I’m sure Tim will correct me. Congratulations! – Tony Love & Light Tony

Response:

I saw my surgeon today, and she told me that two of the three sentinel nodes were positive, so she removed level 1 and 2 lymph nodes, 24 in all. Better out than in sometimes, Joan. All mine were removed and all were negative. I don’t care :-) All mine were removed, too, and only one negative.  I only had nine, which as Tim pointed out is more of a physiological coincidence than anything else.

Yes, and they’re not in nice little rows or lines either, despite what the diagrams seem to describe. As I understand it – and I’m very happy to be enlightened – the nodes are numerous and packed in – surrounded by – protected by – fat. Some, probably the ones very high up, are very small, pin head size. In my case, again as I understand it, the whole lot, fat and all, were scooped out very high up. I believe – because I can still feel the sensation – that the scoop went as far as under my collar bone. I could be wrong – it has been known (G) – but when I suggested this to my surgeon he said that was the case and was surprised that I understood that. When I asked WHY the lot was removed, what made him take everything out, he couldn’t give a scientific reason, he just said, "experience". That was good enough for me although I did resent it at the time. But what might have been the case if he’d left some in? I don’t know. I don’t suppose anyone KNOWS. I trust him. I have no option – but I’m still here :-) Still no lymphedema for me, despite fairly extensive radiation on that side, and a variety of bumps, bruises, scratches, scrapes, insect bites, and a heckuva lot of repetitive resistance upper body exercise.

You’re describing me! A couple of weeks after surgery I fell on animal (goat and poultry) deposited-on gravel and scraped all the soft, tender skin on my affected forearm. I couldn’t be bothered finding the nearest A&E for antibiotics because I ws so thrilled to be back to Real Life (at a mediaeval village) and so I just plastered it with Savlon (First Aiders can now faint!). Nothing happened. Since then I’ve been bruised, scratched, bitten, stung, carried heavy weights dependently (horrors!) and lifted and carried lots of other heavy things and sawn branches and put up canvas tents (and taken them down wet through). I’m not suggesting that this is The Thing To Do but it’s my life and I’m not going to lie on a chaise in a darkened room. I keep a sort of Commonplace book with wise words I collect from several sources – many from here. One is: "Life is not a journey to the grve with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming …. WOW … WHAT A RIDE!!!" Don’t know where that came from but above it is a very wise set of words from one Ann Thorsen. And the used-up-worn-out bit is coming on fast. (Yet one of the women in my support group believes she triggered lymphedema by squeezing too hard when opening a difficult jar lid, so who knows.  But still another had many more nodes removed than I, does everything — e.g., climbing trees! — and has had no problem.)

Oh – I forgot about climbing trees. I don’t do that much but I do climb ladders to gutter height to cut down ivy from the side of our house! I’ve done it since my surgery and every year I wish the surgeon could see me – he’d be proud of me! Despite some of the lymphedema cautions one reads, I definitely lift more than 10-15 pounds with the affected side. . . I lift about as much as I physically can, short of injury risk.  I know for sure that I’ve lifted at least 40 pounds with the affected side, with reasonable frequency — no problems.

Me too. Don’t go pushing yourself hard until you’re fully healed from surgery and radiation, though!

No – but the prescribed exercises are very important. If I hadn’t done them I wouldn’t be able to do what I do now. And it’s not a one-off, I have to stretch every day. Also, I STILL can feel some – er – not exactly pain but sensations in my back and side and occasionally my arm aches. But I’m here! And in a few weeks I’ll want you all to toast my six years :-) )))) Get the champagne in NOW- everyone! Mary

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I saw my surgeon today, and she told me that two of the three sentinel nodes were positive, so she removed level 1 and 2 lymph nodes, 24 in all. Better out than in sometimes, Joan. All mine were removed and all were negative. I don’t care :-) All mine were removed, too, and only one negative.  I only had nine, which as Tim pointed out is more of a physiological coincidence than anything else.  Still no lymphedema for me, despite fairly extensive radiation on that side, and a variety of bumps, bruises, scratches, scrapes, insect bites, and a heckuva lot of repetitive resistance upper body exercise.   (Yet one of the women in my support group believes she triggered lymphedema by squeezing too hard when opening a difficult jar lid, so who knows.  But still another had many more nodes removed than I, does everything — e.g., climbing trees! — and has had no problem.) Despite some of the lymphedema cautions one reads, I definitely lift more than 10-15 pounds with the affected side. . . I lift about as much as I physically can, short of injury risk.  I know for sure that I’ve lifted at least 40 pounds with the affected side, with reasonable frequency — no problems.  Don’t go pushing yourself hard until you’re fully healed from surgery and radiation, though! Glad to hear your pathology news was generally good — one might prefer completely negative nodes, but other than that, it sounds about as good as it gets! Best wishes for a speedy recovery, Ann T.

Thanks, Ann.  That is very encouraging.  I am anxious to get rid of the drain, and on with radiation.  I want to start exercising as soon as the doctor says it is OK.  I am wondering if swimming would be good.  I think there are some public pools in my area, such as YMCA, I might look into joining.  I don’t know about risk of infection, though. {{{Hugs}}}  Joan – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text –

Response:

I saw my surgeon today, and she told me that two of the three sentinel nodes were positive, so she removed level 1 and 2 lymph nodes, 24 in all. Better out than in sometimes, Joan. All mine were removed and all were negative. I don’t care :-)

All mine were removed, too, and only one negative.  I only had nine, which as Tim pointed out is more of a physiological coincidence than anything else.  Still no lymphedema for me, despite fairly extensive radiation on that side, and a variety of bumps, bruises, scratches, scrapes, insect bites, and a heckuva lot of repetitive resistance upper body exercise.   (Yet one of the women in my support group believes she triggered lymphedema by squeezing too hard when opening a difficult jar lid, so who knows.  But still another had many more nodes removed than I, does everything — e.g., climbing trees! — and has had no problem.) Despite some of the lymphedema cautions one reads, I definitely lift more than 10-15 pounds with the affected side. . . I lift about as much as I physically can, short of injury risk.  I know for sure that I’ve lifted at least 40 pounds with the affected side, with reasonable frequency — no problems.  Don’t go pushing yourself hard until you’re fully healed from surgery and radiation, though! Glad to hear your pathology news was generally good — one might prefer completely negative nodes, but other than that, it sounds about as good as it gets! Best wishes for a speedy recovery, Ann T.

Response:

I saw my surgeon today, and she told me that two of the three sentinel nodes were positive, so she removed level 1 and 2 lymph nodes, 24 in all.  All 24 were negative. I still have the drain until Monday, when she will take it out.  It is really sore and uncomfortable, but I am taking Lortab at night to sleep. A nurse comes by twice a week to help.  I will see an oncologist on the 24th to discuss treatment after radiation. So I guess I am doing OK; just wish they had not removed all those lymph nodes!

Better out than in sometimes, Joan. All mine were removed and all were negative. I don’t care :-) Good of you to keep us up to date, thanks. And gentle hugs … Mary – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – {{{Hugs}}}  Joan

Response:

I saw my surgeon today, and she told me that two of the three sentinel nodes were positive, so she removed level 1 and 2 lymph nodes, 24 in all.  All 24 were negative. I still have the drain until Monday, when she will take it out.  It is really sore and uncomfortable, but I am taking Lortab at night to sleep.  A nurse comes by twice a week to help.  I will see an oncologist on the 24th to discuss treatment after radiation. So I guess I am doing OK; just wish they had not removed all those lymph nodes! {{{Hugs}}}  Joan

Response:

I’m confused…you were told: Two of 3 sentinal nodes were positive, so 24 level one AND 2 were removed, but all 24 were negative. —   There appears to have been some kind of (communication?)– error ’cause something sure doesn’t add up here, or were there a total of 27 removed with 24 negative? It’s a shame so many had to be taken — I’m sorry. Don’t blame you for wishing they weren’t, though. SEEMS a bit excessive, although I’m sure your surgeon thought it was best. — Know that things WILL improve –and heal more quickly –once the drain is out, so hang in there. Namaste, Lady8

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I’m confused…you were told: Two of 3 sentinal nodes were positive, so 24 level one AND 2 were removed, but all 24 were negative. —   There appears to have been some kind of (communication?)– error ’cause something sure doesn’t add up here, or were there a total of 27 removed with 24 negative? It’s a shame so many had to be taken — I’m sorry. Don’t blame you for wishing they weren’t, though. SEEMS a bit excessive, although I’m sure your surgeon thought it was best. — Know that things WILL improve –and heal more quickly –once the drain is out, so hang in there. Namaste, Lady8

The number of nodes taken reflects the number present: some people have a lot, some just a few. I don’t think the total itself is particularly good or bad – its a clearance, which is what they do if a sentinel is positive. It would sound as if there were 25 of 27 nodes negative.  Two positive is reasonably good news, of course -none- would be better.but it could be a lot worse. Tim Jackson

Response:

To Mary

Question:

It’s our wedding anniversary on Friday – 44 years. Don’t the years go fast when you’re enjoying yourself?

Belated congratulations, Mary!  What a wonderful milestone! Ann T.

Response:

It’s our wedding anniversary on Friday – 44 years. Don’t the years go fast when you’re enjoying yourself? Belated congratulations, Mary!  What a wonderful milestone!

Thanks. Next year it will be our sapphire, I’ve been told. I like blue :-) Mary – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Ann T.

Response:

hi Mary , I have been married 42 yrs to-morrow 14th and my greatest support has come from my husband through breast cancer twice and a couple of heart attacks in between , now have 4 stents in heart and no boobs and still smiling love Balsey

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – It’s our wedding anniversary on Friday – 44 years. Don’t the years go fast when you’re enjoying yourself? Belated congratulations, Mary!  What a wonderful milestone! Thanks. Next year it will be our sapphire, I’ve been told. I like blue :-) Mary Ann T.

Response:

better fix the mistake it’s the 14th april silly me didn’t look at the dates love balsey

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – hi Mary , I have been married 42 yrs to-morrow 14th and my greatest support has come from my husband through breast cancer twice and a couple of heart attacks in between , now have 4 stents in heart and no boobs and still smiling love Balsey It’s our wedding anniversary on Friday – 44 years. Don’t the years go fast when you’re enjoying yourself? Belated congratulations, Mary!  What a wonderful milestone! Thanks. Next year it will be our sapphire, I’ve been told. I like blue :-) Mary Ann T.

Response:

hi Mary , I have been married 42 yrs to-morrow 14th and my greatest support has come from my husband through breast cancer twice and a couple of heart attacks in between , now have 4 stents in heart and no boobs and still smiling

We’ve had ‘difficulties’ too, they seem only to strengthen our relationship. love Balsey

Thanks for that, enjoy your success story on your anniversary. Mary

Response:

hi Mary , I have been married 42 yrs to-morrow 14th and my greatest support has come from my husband through breast cancer twice and a couple of heart attacks in between , now have 4 stents in heart and no boobs and still smiling

Thanks for writing.  You are a remarkable person, and congratulations on your anniversary.  I have a wonderful son who lives with me, and a very caring sister, so I do have lots of support. I kind of look forward to the echocardiogram and doppler, as I will be able to see my heart beating on the monitor.  This seems amazing to me.  I won’t know the results for about a week, but am not too worried. I am just going along with life as usual, but am trying to eat healthier. Love, Joan – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – We’ve had ‘difficulties’ too, they seem only to strengthen our relationship. love Balsey Thanks for that, enjoy your success story on your anniversary. Mary

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – years. Don’t the years go fast when you’re enjoying yourself? CONGRATS!!!! Thank you. I am quite envious and very much hope to have an opportunity to do the same in 16+ years… You will if you work at it :-) Mary One can be sure to be alive in 16+ years simply by working at it?

Some would say so – not me, although I think we have some control over our health we have none over accidents … Is that independent of current age? My mother is still alive at age 94, and I have to live 20 years to mach that.

Mine’s 91 and I have to live for another 26 years to match it. Since I’ve never been able to match her at anything I don’t suppose I’ll make that either :-) )))))))  Is it necessary to "work at it" harder, or smarter. Or were you speaking of working at the marriage?

Of course. And it can be VERY hard work – but as with all good things it’s worth it  :-) Mary – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text –

Response:

Don’t the years go fast when you’re enjoying yourself? CONGRATS!!!!

Thank you. I am quite envious and very much hope to have an opportunity to do the same in 16+ years…

You will if you work at it :-) Mary – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text –

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Don’t the years go fast when you’re enjoying yourself? CONGRATS!!!! Thank you. I am quite envious and very much hope to have an opportunity to do the same in 16+ years… You will if you work at it :-) Mary

One can be sure to be alive in 16+ years simply by working at it? Is that independent of current age? My mother is still alive at age 94, and I have to live 20 years to mach that. Is it necessary to "work at it" harder, or smarter. Or were you speaking of working at the marriage?

Response:

Thanks for the e-mail.  I have ordered a copy of the book by Dr. Love from Amazon.com.  I found a used copy for $5.60.  I should get it in about a week. Best wishes, and belated Happy Birthday! Joan

Response:

Thanks for the e-mail.  I have ordered a copy of the book by Dr. Love from Amazon.com.  I found a used copy for $5.60.  I should get it in about a week.

Good! You won’t be sorry. Best wishes, and belated Happy Birthday!

Thank you! It’s our wedding anniversary on Friday – 44 years. Don’t the years go fast when you’re enjoying yourself? Mary – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Joan

Response:

the years go fast when you’re enjoying yourself? CONGRATS!!!! I am quite envious and very much hope to have an opportunity to do the same in 16+ years…

Response:

Thanks, Mary, for recommending that I read the book by Dr. Susan Love.  I found lots of valuable information in it, and I believe it will be a help in making the decisions I will need to make after surgery. I am scheduled for an echocardiogram and a Doppler exam on the 15th of this month.  This will take 3 to 4 hours, with no breakfast that day. After I get the results, I should be able to schedule the lumpectomy and radiation.  A girl from my oncologist’s office called me yesterday to get an update, and asked how I was doing, and what I had decided.  She said they were praying for me.  I have never had such concern from any medical staff before, so it was comforting.

I’m very pleased for everything. And I’ve never heard of anyone being disappointed in The Breast Book! Mary – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Joan

Response:

Thanks, Mary, for recommending that I read the book by Dr. Susan Love.  I found lots of valuable information in it, and I believe it will be a help in making the decisions I will need to make after surgery. I am scheduled for an echocardiogram and a Doppler exam on the 15th of this month.  This will take 3 to 4 hours, with no breakfast that day. After I get the results, I should be able to schedule the lumpectomy and radiation.  A girl from my oncologist’s office called me yesterday to get an update, and asked how I was doing, and what I had decided.  She said they were praying for me.  I have never had such concern from any medical staff before, so it was comforting. Joan

Response:

test

Question:

HURRAY!  Permission to live on Cheetos!  Thank you, Mary!

Hasn’t this been a cheerful test! Mary – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text –

Response:

the joke’s on you, I was referring to DOG biscuits!

Don’t really understand the significance but I don’t eat those either … giving the right answer to the wrong question is not a surefire way to progress through academe

That’s why I don’t have a degree :-) ))))) Mary – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – | | if this were an essay question, one could, of course, take the time to | describe the overlap in detail…but with a multiple choice, one is stuck | with choosing the MOST appropriate answer, albeit other answers may be | somewhat suitable, they are not the MOST suitable… | | Mary Fisher, to the corner. | | No biscuit for you. | | Don’t eat biscuits. | | Nyer nyer. | | M | | I still think it was the wrong question … | | | | | | | | | Saddam MIGHT appear to be a good answer, but careful re-reading will | | indicate the test was not asking about CURRENT situations, but past… | | | | You’ve discovered my weakness. My school mistresses always said I should | | read the questions first. I’m such a creature of impulse. | | | | You’re right of course but there surely is some overlap? | | | | Mary | | | | | | | | | | | | | | I say the answer is | | | D – William Shakespeare | | | | | | These multi-guess questions aren’t really a challenge though are | they? | | | | | | B – Saddam Hussein is another possibility after all. | | | | | | Mary | | | | | | message | | | | test | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | |

Response:

HURRAY!  Permission to live on Cheetos!  Thank you, Mary!

|

| Send me potatoes, tomatoes and apple sauce…don’t care for the rest. But | you cannot prepare a potato in a way I do not like…I love potatoes! | | I’d hazard a guess that by the time they got to you they’d be past their | best … you’ll hve to stick with Cheetos. | | And anyway, there’s nothing left :-) | | Mary | | | | | | | no need to apologize re Cheetos, that’s just more for us, and I will | leave | | all other foods mentioned by you…to you! | | | | | | Mary | | Now to tend to the roast pork, roast potatoes, home grown leek so fresh | it | | squeaks, hg grilled tomatoes and hg apple sauce. Followed by still warm | | ginger cake … but you won’t want to hear about any of those :-) | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Heck, even my dog won’t eat dog biscuits, he prefers | Cheetos… | | | | | | Here we go again. What are Cheetos? | | | | | | Cheetos are small snacky-food things.  They are little puffs made | out | | of | | a | | | corn paste, deep fried, and coated in orange cheese powder. They | come | | in | | | two varieties: crispy and puffy.  The puffy ones appear to have | been | | fried | | | at a higher temperature.  They are equally delicious. | | | | | | Sorry, Catharine, crosem and anyone else, I really don’t like the | sound | | of | | | them! | | | | | | | | | I made growler for supper tonight … | | | | | | | | | Knowing the U.K., that has to involved potatoes, cabbage or baked | | beans | | in | | | some way.  What is it? | | | | | | None of those. I don’t touch baked beans anyway! WE only eat | potatoes | | once | | a | | | week at the most and cabbage far less frequently – but the other | | brasiccas | | I | | | grow every few days. | | | | | | We recently bought a 4 cwt pig, cut it up, processed it and then | | collapsed! | | | | | | I made masses of dry and wet cured ham, sausage and bacon and froze | pork | | | cuts. There were basins of lard and pots of bones (for Spouse to | make | | | needles, dice and other mediaeval things from). | | | | | | When I took the corners off the bacon I soaked it and, with a small | | part, | | | made growlers. They’re pork pies. Hot water pastry, hand raised, | meat | | mixed | | | with pepper put in and crammed down, a lid put on and baked. | | | | | | We had them with all home grown saladings, it was delightful. I’ll | send | | a | | | picture if you like. | | | | | | So. Growlers are pork pies. Bangers are sausages. Black pudding is | blood | | and | | | fat cooked in skins. Brawn is head cheese. Bath chaps are each side | of | | the | | | snout. | | | | | | Anything else you need to know? | | | | | | Haggis is nothing to do with pig. | | | | | | :-) )))))))) | | | | | | Mary | | | | | | — | | | Aloha, | | | Catharine | | | | | | Character is what you do when no one’s watching. | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | |

Response:

if this were an essay question, one could, of course, take the time to describe the overlap in detail…but with a multiple choice, one is stuck with choosing the MOST appropriate answer, albeit other answers may be somewhat suitable, they are not the MOST suitable… Mary Fisher, to the corner. No biscuit for you.

|

| Saddam MIGHT appear to be a good answer, but careful re-reading will | indicate the test was not asking about CURRENT situations, but past… | | You’ve discovered my weakness. My school mistresses always said I should | read the questions first. I’m such a creature of impulse. | | You’re right of course but there surely is some overlap? | | Mary | | | | | | | | I say the answer is | | D – William Shakespeare | | | | These multi-guess questions aren’t really a challenge though are they? | | | | B – Saddam Hussein is another possibility after all. | | | | Mary | | | | | | | test | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | |

Response:

if this were an essay question, one could, of course, take the time to describe the overlap in detail…but with a multiple choice, one is stuck with choosing the MOST appropriate answer, albeit other answers may be somewhat suitable, they are not the MOST suitable… Mary Fisher, to the corner. No biscuit for you.

Don’t eat biscuits. Nyer nyer. M I still think it was the wrong question … – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – | | Saddam MIGHT appear to be a good answer, but careful re-reading will | indicate the test was not asking about CURRENT situations, but past… | | You’ve discovered my weakness. My school mistresses always said I should | read the questions first. I’m such a creature of impulse. | | You’re right of course but there surely is some overlap? | | Mary | | | | | | | | I say the answer is | | D – William Shakespeare | | | | These multi-guess questions aren’t really a challenge though are they? | | | | B – Saddam Hussein is another possibility after all. | | | | Mary | | | | | | | test | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | |

Response:

I know that in England "biscuit" means "cookie," so I knew what you meant. But here, we call dog treats "dog biscuits" and they are not tasty to people. There is NOTHING wrong w/ not having a degree…it’s just a piece of paper, and a very expensive piece at that.  There are all sorts of successful people, including you, who have NO degree, and all sorts of idiots who have degrees…go figure.

|

| the joke’s on you, I was referring to DOG biscuits! | | Don’t really understand the significance but I don’t eat those either … | | giving the right answer to the wrong question is not a surefire way to | progress through academe | | That’s why I don’t have a degree :-) ))))) | | Mary | | | | | | if this were an essay question, one could, of course, take the time to | | describe the overlap in detail…but with a multiple choice, one is | stuck | | with choosing the MOST appropriate answer, albeit other answers may be | | somewhat suitable, they are not the MOST suitable… | | | | Mary Fisher, to the corner. | | | | No biscuit for you. | | | | Don’t eat biscuits. | | | | Nyer nyer. | | | | M | | | | I still think it was the wrong question … | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Saddam MIGHT appear to be a good answer, but careful re-reading | will | | | indicate the test was not asking about CURRENT situations, but | past… | | | | | | You’ve discovered my weakness. My school mistresses always said I | should | | | read the questions first. I’m such a creature of impulse. | | | | | | You’re right of course but there surely is some overlap? | | | | | | Mary | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | I say the answer is | | | | D – William Shakespeare | | | | | | | | These multi-guess questions aren’t really a challenge though are | | they? | | | | | | | | B – Saddam Hussein is another possibility after all. | | | | | | | | Mary | | | | | | | | | message | | | | | test | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | |

Response:

Send me potatoes, tomatoes and apple sauce…don’t care for the rest.  But you cannot prepare a potato in a way I do not like…I love potatoes!

I’d hazard a guess that by the time they got to you they’d be past their best … you’ll hve to stick with Cheetos. And anyway, there’s nothing left :-) Mary – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – | | no need to apologize re Cheetos, that’s just more for us, and I will leave | all other foods mentioned by you…to you! | | | Mary | Now to tend to the roast pork, roast potatoes, home grown leek so fresh it | squeaks, hg grilled tomatoes and hg apple sauce. Followed by still warm | ginger cake … but you won’t want to hear about any of those :-) | | | | | | | | | Heck, even my dog won’t eat dog biscuits, he prefers Cheetos… | | | | Here we go again. What are Cheetos? | | | | Cheetos are small snacky-food things.  They are little puffs made out | of | a | | corn paste, deep fried, and coated in orange cheese powder.  They come | in | | two varieties: crispy and puffy.  The puffy ones appear to have been | fried | | at a higher temperature.  They are equally delicious. | | | | Sorry, Catharine, crosem and anyone else, I really don’t like the sound | of | | them! | | | | | | I made growler for supper tonight … | | | | | | Knowing the U.K., that has to involved potatoes, cabbage or baked | beans | in | | some way.  What is it? | | | | None of those. I don’t touch baked beans anyway! WE only eat potatoes | once | a | | week at the most and cabbage far less frequently – but the other | brasiccas | I | | grow every few days. | | | | We recently bought a 4 cwt pig, cut it up, processed it and then | collapsed! | | | | I made masses of dry and wet cured ham, sausage and bacon and froze pork | | cuts. There were basins of lard and pots of bones (for Spouse to make | | needles, dice and other mediaeval things from). | | | | When I took the corners off the bacon I soaked it and, with a small | part, | | made growlers. They’re pork pies. Hot water pastry, hand raised, meat | mixed | | with pepper put in and crammed down, a lid put on and baked. | | | | We had them with all home grown saladings, it was delightful. I’ll send | a | | picture if you like. | | | | So. Growlers are pork pies. Bangers are sausages. Black pudding is blood | and | | fat cooked in skins. Brawn is head cheese. Bath chaps are each side of | the | | snout. | | | | Anything else you need to know? | | | | Haggis is nothing to do with pig. | | | | :-) )))))))) | | | | Mary | | | | — | | Aloha, | | Catharine | | | | Character is what you do when no one’s watching. | | | | | | | |

Response:

no need to apologize re Cheetos, that’s just more for us, and I will leave all other foods mentioned by you…to you!

Mary Now to tend to the roast pork, roast potatoes, home grown leek so fresh it squeaks, hg grilled tomatoes and hg apple sauce. Followed by still warm ginger cake … but you won’t want to hear about any of those :-) – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – | | | Heck, even my dog won’t eat dog biscuits, he prefers Cheetos… | | Here we go again. What are Cheetos? | | Cheetos are small snacky-food things.  They are little puffs made out of a | corn paste, deep fried, and coated in orange cheese powder.  They come in | two varieties: crispy and puffy.  The puffy ones appear to have been fried | at a higher temperature.  They are equally delicious. | | Sorry, Catharine, crosem and anyone else, I really don’t like the sound of | them! | | | I made growler for supper tonight … | | | Knowing the U.K., that has to involved potatoes, cabbage or baked beans in | some way.  What is it? | | None of those. I don’t touch baked beans anyway! WE only eat potatoes once a | week at the most and cabbage far less frequently – but the other brasiccas I | grow every few days. | | We recently bought a 4 cwt pig, cut it up, processed it and then collapsed! | | I made masses of dry and wet cured ham, sausage and bacon and froze pork | cuts. There were basins of lard and pots of bones (for Spouse to make | needles, dice and other mediaeval things from). | | When I took the corners off the bacon I soaked it and, with a small part, | made growlers. They’re pork pies. Hot water pastry, hand raised, meat mixed | with pepper put in and crammed down, a lid put on and baked. | | We had them with all home grown saladings, it was delightful. I’ll send a | picture if you like. | | So. Growlers are pork pies. Bangers are sausages. Black pudding is blood and | fat cooked in skins. Brawn is head cheese. Bath chaps are each side of the | snout. | | Anything else you need to know? | | Haggis is nothing to do with pig. | | :-) )))))))) | | Mary | | — | Aloha, | Catharine | | Character is what you do when no one’s watching. | |

Response:

Send me potatoes, tomatoes and apple sauce…don’t care for the rest.  But you cannot prepare a potato in a way I do not like…I love potatoes!

|

| no need to apologize re Cheetos, that’s just more for us, and I will leave | all other foods mentioned by you…to you! | | | Mary | Now to tend to the roast pork, roast potatoes, home grown leek so fresh it | squeaks, hg grilled tomatoes and hg apple sauce. Followed by still warm | ginger cake … but you won’t want to hear about any of those :-) | | | | | | | | | Heck, even my dog won’t eat dog biscuits, he prefers Cheetos… | | | | Here we go again. What are Cheetos? | | | | Cheetos are small snacky-food things.  They are little puffs made out | of | a | | corn paste, deep fried, and coated in orange cheese powder.  They come | in | | two varieties: crispy and puffy.  The puffy ones appear to have been | fried | | at a higher temperature.  They are equally delicious. | | | | Sorry, Catharine, crosem and anyone else, I really don’t like the sound | of | | them! | | | | | | I made growler for supper tonight … | | | | | | Knowing the U.K., that has to involved potatoes, cabbage or baked | beans | in | | some way.  What is it? | | | | None of those. I don’t touch baked beans anyway! WE only eat potatoes | once | a | | week at the most and cabbage far less frequently – but the other | brasiccas | I | | grow every few days. | | | | We recently bought a 4 cwt pig, cut it up, processed it and then | collapsed! | | | | I made masses of dry and wet cured ham, sausage and bacon and froze pork | | cuts. There were basins of lard and pots of bones (for Spouse to make | | needles, dice and other mediaeval things from). | | | | When I took the corners off the bacon I soaked it and, with a small | part, | | made growlers. They’re pork pies. Hot water pastry, hand raised, meat | mixed | | with pepper put in and crammed down, a lid put on and baked. | | | | We had them with all home grown saladings, it was delightful. I’ll send | a | | picture if you like. | | | | So. Growlers are pork pies. Bangers are sausages. Black pudding is blood | and | | fat cooked in skins. Brawn is head cheese. Bath chaps are each side of | the | | snout. | | | | Anything else you need to know? | | | | Haggis is nothing to do with pig. | | | | :-) )))))))) | | | | Mary | | | | — | | Aloha, | | Catharine | | | | Character is what you do when no one’s watching. | | | | | | | |

Response:

the history and making of lutes

Now that’s a pretty small field.  Do you know Eph Segerman of Northern Renaissance Instruments, researcher into the science of early music?  He was my careers adviser at university and a long time friend. Tim

Response:

Heck, even my dog won’t eat dog biscuits, he prefers Cheetos… Here we go again. What are Cheetos?

Cheetos are small snacky-food things.  They are little puffs made out of a corn paste, deep fried, and coated in orange cheese powder.  They come in two varieties: crispy and puffy.  The puffy ones appear to have been fried at a higher temperature.  They are equally delicious. I made growler for supper tonight …

Knowing the U.K., that has to involved potatoes, cabbage or baked beans in some way.  What is it? — Aloha, Catharine Character is what you do when no one’s watching.

Response:

. . . furniture from arable waste,

OK, Mary — I can’t resist . . . it’s your turn to explain.  What the heck is "furniture from arable waste" all about? Ann T.

Response:

. . . furniture from arable waste, OK, Mary — I can’t resist . . . it’s your turn to explain.  What the heck is "furniture from arable waste" all about?

Straw is a problem, you can’t burn it and it causes problems with disposal. It can be compressed into boards or other profiles and – well – made into furniture. In South Africa they (used to at least) use compressed straw for pit props, it can be very strong. It’s now used for building houses too as well as a fuel for heating. It can be shredded and incorporated into plastics as a filler to mould any form required. The main problem with its use for any of these purposes is its transport, it must be used near its production site to be environmentally freindly. But that applies to most raw materials. I think I still have the theses somewhere, goodness knows where though and my poor brain, even without the excuse of chemo, isn’t as sharp as it used to be :-) Mary – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Ann T.

Response:

Heck, even my dog won’t eat dog biscuits, he prefers Cheetos… Here we go again. What are Cheetos? Cheetos are small snacky-food things.  They are little puffs made out of a corn paste, deep fried, and coated in orange cheese powder.  They come in two varieties: crispy and puffy.  The puffy ones appear to have been fried at a higher temperature.  They are equally delicious.

Sorry, Catharine, crosem and anyone else, I really don’t like the sound of them! I made growler for supper tonight … Knowing the U.K., that has to involved potatoes, cabbage or baked beans in some way.  What is it?

None of those. I don’t touch baked beans anyway! WE only eat potatoes once a week at the most and cabbage far less frequently – but the other brasiccas I grow every few days. We recently bought a 4 cwt pig, cut it up, processed it and then collapsed! I made masses of dry and wet cured ham, sausage and bacon and froze pork cuts. There were basins of lard and pots of bones (for Spouse to make needles, dice and other mediaeval things from). When I took the corners off the bacon I soaked it and, with a small part, made growlers. They’re pork pies. Hot water pastry, hand raised, meat mixed with pepper put in and crammed down, a lid put on and baked. We had them with all home grown saladings, it was delightful. I’ll send a picture if you like. So. Growlers are pork pies. Bangers are sausages. Black pudding is blood and fat cooked in skins. Brawn is head cheese. Bath chaps are each side of the snout. Anything else you need to know? Haggis is nothing to do with pig. :-) )))))))) Mary – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – — Aloha, Catharine Character is what you do when no one’s watching.

Response:

no need to apologize re Cheetos, that’s just more for us, and I will leave all other foods mentioned by you…to you!

| | | Heck, even my dog won’t eat dog biscuits, he prefers Cheetos… | | Here we go again. What are Cheetos? | | Cheetos are small snacky-food things.  They are little puffs made out of a | corn paste, deep fried, and coated in orange cheese powder.  They come in | two varieties: crispy and puffy.  The puffy ones appear to have been fried | at a higher temperature.  They are equally delicious. | | Sorry, Catharine, crosem and anyone else, I really don’t like the sound of | them! | | | I made growler for supper tonight … | | | Knowing the U.K., that has to involved potatoes, cabbage or baked beans in | some way.  What is it? | | None of those. I don’t touch baked beans anyway! WE only eat potatoes once a | week at the most and cabbage far less frequently – but the other brasiccas I | grow every few days. | | We recently bought a 4 cwt pig, cut it up, processed it and then collapsed! | | I made masses of dry and wet cured ham, sausage and bacon and froze pork | cuts. There were basins of lard and pots of bones (for Spouse to make | needles, dice and other mediaeval things from). | | When I took the corners off the bacon I soaked it and, with a small part, | made growlers. They’re pork pies. Hot water pastry, hand raised, meat mixed | with pepper put in and crammed down, a lid put on and baked. | | We had them with all home grown saladings, it was delightful. I’ll send a | picture if you like. | | So. Growlers are pork pies. Bangers are sausages. Black pudding is blood and | fat cooked in skins. Brawn is head cheese. Bath chaps are each side of the | snout. | | Anything else you need to know? | | Haggis is nothing to do with pig. | | :-) )))))))) | | Mary | | — | Aloha, | Catharine | | Character is what you do when no one’s watching. | |

Response:

I know that in England "biscuit" means "cookie," so I knew what you meant. But here, we call dog treats "dog biscuits" and they are not tasty to people.

I bow to your greater experience :-) ))))) There is NOTHING wrong w/ not having a degree…it’s just a piece of paper, and a very expensive piece at that.

I know that, having done several by proxy and our children having their names on the papers! I did get acknowledgements on their theses though… Ask me anything about timber-framed buildings, furniture from arable waste, war artists, the history and making of lutes, the overlap of modern science and Christianity … no don’t bother, it’s all too long ago :-) But I can talk for England about beeswax!  There are all sorts of successful people, including you, who have NO degree, and all sorts of idiots who have degrees…go figure.

Oh. Thanks, I think. I was almost expecting someone to say that it shows (my having no degree)! In fact I was about to say it myself but thought I’d let someone else have the pleasure. I’m like that, generous to a fault! Still haven’t worked out what go figure means though … Help? Mary

Response:

"go figure" is a NY Jewish expression.  it sort of means "who knows?"  or "What can I say?" or "What can we do about that?" Everyone says it now… Mind your own beeswax…do you know what that means? Heck, even my dog won’t eat dog biscuits, he prefers Cheetos…

|

| I know that in England "biscuit" means "cookie," so I knew what you meant. | | But here, we call dog treats "dog biscuits" and they are not tasty to | people. | | I bow to your greater experience :-) ))))) | | There is NOTHING wrong w/ not having a degree…it’s just a piece of | paper, | and a very expensive piece at that. | | I know that, having done several by proxy and our children having their | names on the papers! I did get acknowledgements on their theses though… | Ask me anything about timber-framed buildings, furniture from arable waste, | war artists, the history and making of lutes, the overlap of modern science | and Christianity … no don’t bother, it’s all too long ago :-) | | But I can talk for England about beeswax! | |  There are all sorts of successful | people, including you, who have NO degree, and all sorts of idiots who | have | degrees…go figure. | | Oh. Thanks, I think. I was almost expecting someone to say that it shows (my | having no degree)! In fact I was about to say it myself but thought I’d let | someone else have the pleasure. I’m like that, generous to a fault! | | Still haven’t worked out what go figure means though … | | Help? | | Mary | | | |

Response:

"go figure" is a NY Jewish expression.  it sort of means "who knows?"  or "What can I say?" or "What can we do about that?" Everyone says it now…

Oh, thanks. Is it mandatory to say it? My memory isn’t all that good … Mind your own beeswax…do you know what that means?

No, but I’d love to. I suppose it’s a variation on mind your own business but it doesn’t make much sense, apart from the alliteration. Heck, even my dog won’t eat dog biscuits, he prefers Cheetos…

Here we go again. What are Cheetos? I made growler for supper tonight … Mary – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – | | I know that in England "biscuit" means "cookie," so I knew what you meant. | | But here, we call dog treats "dog biscuits" and they are not tasty to | people. | | I bow to your greater experience :-) ))))) | | There is NOTHING wrong w/ not having a degree…it’s just a piece of | paper, | and a very expensive piece at that. | | I know that, having done several by proxy and our children having their | names on the papers! I did get acknowledgements on their theses though… | Ask me anything about timber-framed buildings, furniture from arable waste, | war artists, the history and making of lutes, the overlap of modern science | and Christianity … no don’t bother, it’s all too long ago :-) | | But I can talk for England about beeswax! | |  There are all sorts of successful | people, including you, who have NO degree, and all sorts of idiots who | have | degrees…go figure. | | Oh. Thanks, I think. I was almost expecting someone to say that it shows (my | having no degree)! In fact I was about to say it myself but thought I’d let | someone else have the pleasure. I’m like that, generous to a fault! | | Still haven’t worked out what go figure means though … | | Help? | | Mary | | | |

Response:

the joke’s on you, I was referring to DOG biscuits! giving the right answer to the wrong question is not a surefire way to progress through academe

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| if this were an essay question, one could, of course, take the time to | describe the overlap in detail…but with a multiple choice, one is stuck | with choosing the MOST appropriate answer, albeit other answers may be | somewhat suitable, they are not the MOST suitable… | | Mary Fisher, to the corner. | | No biscuit for you. | | Don’t eat biscuits. | | Nyer nyer. | | M | | I still think it was the wrong question … | | | | | | | | | Saddam MIGHT appear to be a good answer, but careful re-reading will | | indicate the test was not asking about CURRENT situations, but past… | | | | You’ve discovered my weakness. My school mistresses always said I should | | read the questions first. I’m such a creature of impulse. | | | | You’re right of course but there surely is some overlap? | | | | Mary | | | | | | | | | | | | | | I say the answer is | | | D – William Shakespeare | | | | | | These multi-guess questions aren’t really a challenge though are | they? | | | | | | B – Saddam Hussein is another possibility after all. | | | | | | Mary | | | | | | message | | | | test | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | |

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I say the answer is D – William Shakespeare

| test | |

Response:

I say the answer is D – William Shakespeare

These multi-guess questions aren’t really a challenge though are they? B – Saddam Hussein is another possibility after all. Mary – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – | test | |

Response:

Saddam MIGHT appear to be a good answer, but careful re-reading will indicate the test was not asking about CURRENT situations, but past…

|

| I say the answer is | D – William Shakespeare | | These multi-guess questions aren’t really a challenge though are they? | | B – Saddam Hussein is another possibility after all. | | Mary | | | | test | | | | | | | |

Response:

Saddam MIGHT appear to be a good answer, but careful re-reading will indicate the test was not asking about CURRENT situations, but past…

You’ve discovered my weakness. My school mistresses always said I should read the questions first. I’m such a creature of impulse. You’re right of course but there surely is some overlap? Mary – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – | | I say the answer is | D – William Shakespeare | | These multi-guess questions aren’t really a challenge though are they? | | B – Saddam Hussein is another possibility after all. | | Mary | | | | test | | | | | | | |

Response:

This is a test of the Lowe Family emergency broadcast system.  Just trying to see if my messages reach the newsgroup.  Previous postings have not reached their destination. Robin Lowe

Response:

Coming in loud and clear Robin. Seems to be working. ~Pam~

Response:

This is a test of the Lowe Family emergency broadcast system.  Just trying to see if my messages reach the newsgroup.  Previous postings have not reached their destination. Robin Lowe

Certainly received your ‘7-year’ post. Rob

Response:

robin read ya loud and clear!!!!:-) i was worried about you since i did not see you here for a while.  now i see ya and i know you are ok <whew love linda b

Response:

Getting/Reading them here too…. take care there dear Robin annie When life seems unfair ~~ remember "Reach up as far as you can…and God will reach down the rest of the way"     ~annie~